What's Your Story?
by not some barbie
Summary: Everyone has a story. What's yours? AU NH Read and Review!
1. Chapter 1

_"You don't know me and you don't even care..."_

Each day is the same in a sense that nothing interesting ever happens; same people and same meaningless drama that never stimulates. There is never a moment when something changes and you feel - alive. Sometimes you can't help but wonder that if something strange and unexpected did happen, would you even notice? After awhile life just becomes a series of actions that you go through, not really paying attention, just doing the moments. You end up not giving much thought to the decisions you make, because in the end it all comes out the same. There are never moments when you are left wondering if everything you knew could be questioned. Moments like that are what shape you and make you strong, but if one never had them, how could they learn?

In a strange sense we all want one thing, and that is to feel that we matter, that there is someone out there who cares about us, who makes us feel so great. We thrive on the touch of the one who loves us. It overtakes you in such a way, that it as if you completely leave this world and find another. A place where your dreams do matter and everything that your heart feels can come true. There is no fear in the one you love, because they embrace who you are and what you are, but in the simplest of terms, they embrace you. They don't question what you are, or even why you are that way, because they know no matter what they say you won't change.

There they sat, arms crossed and tempers flaring. It was the same argument and to be honest, they were both tired of it. Tired of trying to find the silver lining, the light at the end of the tunnel, or whatever metaphor one chooses to use. "I have nothing left to say." She muttered incoherently. What was the point of trying to explain anything to him? He was mentally incapable of seeing anything the way she did.

"You know that's a lie." He fired back. "I know that no matter what I do and no matter what I say, you can't ignore me. You thrive on the fact that you want to change who I am. I am nothing but a charity case to you!"

She gave a sharp intake of breath and glared. How dare he try and twist her actions around for something completely false. What right did he have to think he knew who she was and what she was doing? "I cannot believe you!" The girl shrieked. "All I have been doing for the past year is opening up to you, trying to get you to at least open up with me!"

"Right, I'm sure." He replied coldly. What did she know? It was endless with them, constant fights that would go on for hours. Nothing changing how they felt, it was always the same. "You are infuriating." Nathan muttered under his breath.

Haley looked up from the familiar spot she had been studying on the ground. "Excuse me? Care to share that with the class? I'm infuriating? Apparently you have not met yourself. Nathan , you are the one that no one can stand. People just put up with you because you are Mr. Basketball Star . If you switched places and lived in my shoes for one day, then you wouldn't be so tolerated. Your attitude is not appreciated by people. You find pleasure it hurting others and that is sick."

"Oh shut up, Haley ." Nathan said with a bitter laugh. "Do you really think that you are some freakin' saint? Little Miss Haley James is sure loved by everyone. You are nothing but a doormat." The words were harsh and Nathan knew it, but he couldn't let her win. Letting her win was a price he could not pay. "It only took me a month to get you in my bed." He should have seen in coming, but he was completely focused on his rage. Her hand flew across his cheek and he was left stunned. "Bitch."

Now it was Haley 's turn to laugh. "How dare you! HOW DARE YOU!" She yelled, her chest rising with each intake of breath. "You completely took advantage of me and now you bring it back to haunt me? What kind of sick twisted bastard does something like that? Oh right, you!"

"I'm the bastard?" Nathan questioned. It motivated him to egg her on. Push her buttons until she finally showed her true colors. Over the year that he grew to know Haley , she was quite reserved at times. It would take a lot to force her anger and Nathan loved pushing it. She took chances with him and Nathan loved it. Haley James was not the girl that most people thought. There were moments when she was completely cold and angry, just as he is. "What are you so afraid of Haley ? Does it scare you that maybe, just maybe you aren't the perfect princess everyone thinks you are?"

Her whole body shook with anger and only Nathan Scott could do that to her. "I never claimed to be perfect, Nathan ." Her voice was an eerie calm, but Nathan knew better. He could see in her soulful brown eyes that she was thinking and working, trying to find the perfect set of words to throw back at him. "You pass so much judgment on me, but yet you never stop and examine yourself. At least I know who I am Nathan . Can you honestly say the same?" She waited a moment for him to respond, but words never came. "I figured. Nathan , if you think that I am predictable, take a look at yourself. I can predict what your future will be without even really knowing you. Anyone could really. This is where you will be in the next year, playing basketball for Duke University with endless women on your arm. It's been set in stone that this is the life you will have."

"What if I don't want that?" His tone of voice surprised her. The sincerity behind it was strange and unfamiliar. "Everyone just assumes that I want that life. Maybe I don't really care for it..."

Haley sighed loudly, picking at her nails. "I want to believe that's true Nathan , but be real here. If you didn't want this life, you would have changed. Don't sit here and tell me you are not happy, because I know you are. Every time I try and talk about your real dream, you change the question immediately. What is a life without dreams and goals?"

"I have dreams." Nathan said in quick defense. "Sorry that they aren't has deep and meaningful as yours, but I do have things I want in life. Maybe I just believe in that whole, don't tell or it won't come true thing..."

Despite the uncomfortable feel of the situation, Haley smiled. "Those are wishes, Nathan ."

"Same thing."

You see how they are at this very moment, the anger and pain clouding who they use to be. Who are Nathan Scott and Haley James ? Some may seem them as two complex souls searching for something that seems lost, but others just see them as two people who want so much more out of life. Isn't that what we all want? The chance to find something in life that is meaningful? Perhaps they wanted to find a purpose or something more? "You don't know me, Nathan ."

"You don't know me either." His response was cold and distant, but that came as no surprise to Haley . "You really couldn't handle who I truly am. No one really could"

Haley scoffed and stood up, brushing off her jeans. "Sure, I don't know you, whatever Nathan . I can't do this anymore. I can't care anymore."

Sometimes it just made sense to tell a lie. The pain of the truth was far too much for Haley to handle. She desperately wanted to tell Nathan how much she loved him, but in the end it would only end badly. Nathan Scott couldn't fall in love and Haley James knew that.


	2. Chapter 2

_"Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs are people who have come alive." - Howard Truman_

Haley sat back reflecting on her past year with Nathan . They became friends by force and lack of free will, but in the end they formed a bond that most would not even begin to understand. She remembers the first thing he ever said to her, "_I won't change for you." _That became the basis of why she became so involved. Nathan was so set in his ways that nothing was going to shake him. No matter how hard she begged and cried, he stayed the same. Haley desperately searched for hints to why Nathan was this way, but in the end she found nothing. After quite some time she decided to give up and let Nathan be who he wanted.

She blames herself for how they are and why things never changed. One night she made a mistake and gave into this unknown desire and Nathan never let her forget it. His blue eyes were so inviting and warm, but she knew better, or at least she thought she did. Haley always had pride for being the smart girl who never let a boy get the best of her, but Nathan Scott knew how too. Every word that came out of his mouth was cold, but there would be these rare moments when the walls would crumble and he was vulnerable.

In a lot of ways, Haley felt responsible for Nathan . His well being mattered to her and she hated to see him suffer. When they would sit and have their talks, he would pace with nerves, showing Haley that there was something going on, but he never let her know.

_"Nathan, will please just sit down?" Haley asked as nice as she could. It had been an hour and all Nathan did was walk back and forth, chewing on his lip nervously. Something was bothering him, but every time she brought it up, he would just glare and then proceed to roll his eyes. "Are you going to tell me what is going on?" She asked softly. Nathan said nothing, but sat down in a chair, staring out at the window. "Fine, have it your way."_

_Time passed slowly, but Haley would not budge. Over her dead body would Nathan win this one. He was going to talk if she had to strangle him. "What is your deal?" Nathan finally spoke. "Why do you want to help me so much?" Haley shrugged, wishing she could give him an answer that made sense. Truth be told, she wasn't sure what it was that attracted her to Nathan Scott, but she knew one day it would all make sense. "I'm not exactly a stand up guy. Why would someone like you even want to be around someone like me? Seriously, I already took advantage of you once, but you didn't leave. Sure, you were pissed and punched me right in the nose," Haley giggled at the memory, "but you stuck around. I just want to know why..."_

_"You ask a lot of questions, Nathan." Haley said with a sly smile, similar to the one he gave her earlier. "Why do you spend so much time trying to figure out why things are the way that they are? You should just live your life and see what happens." Nathan shrugged, obviously not understanding her whole concept. "I really just wish you would be more open with me. I'm not out to judge you."_

_Nathan scoffed at her statement. "We all judge, Haley. I judge you and you judge me. Don't sit here and act like you are so above me. I get the fact that you want to help me, but did you ever stop to think that maybe, just maybe I don't want your freakin' help?" Their eyes locked and Nathan smirked. He knew where it was going and he was going to win it. "You need to stop wearing your heart on your sleeve. Imagine what would happen if you actually had a social life. Guys who screw you left and right because you actually think they care."_

_Tears began to well up in her eyes as she listened to his cold, evil words. Never had she met a person who could be so cruel, but that was Nathan. "Wow, tell me how you really feel..." _

_"I won't ever love you, Haley. You're the girl that guys will use and then throw away, because you show your weakness. People are going to rip you apart if you aren't strong enough." Nathan stood up and leaned against the door frame of the classroom. "I'm sure you think that there is something going on between us, that we have this deep connection that could only be true love, but that isn't the case. Yeah, I think you're hot and if I had the chance I would totally do you again, but I won't love you." The tears were free falling now, but Nathan didn't care. He was angry and she was in his line of fire. "I don't even believe in love, Haley. Seriously, something like that can not be real. Happiness does not exist. Dreams do not come true. Whoever feeds kids that line of crap is going to burn in hell."_

_Haley jumped up from her seat, ready to challenge him. "Fear is doing this to you. You try and act like you are all big and bad, but really you are just a scared little boy. I see right through you, just like you see right through me. Sure, you have the rest of the world fooled, but not me." Nathan turned away, but she grabbed his face, demanding his attention. "There is nothing wrong with dreams. Don't make me go all Jiminy Cricket on your ass and sing 'When You Wish Upon a Star' because I will. Whoever told you it's not okay to wish and hope they are wrong. Nathan, I know that deep down you are a good guy, but something has you so closed off..." Her thoughts were interrupted by his soft lips landing on hers. Every instinct was screaming to pull away and run far from him, but her heart was just crying out for more. _

_His hands moved slowly down to her waist and pulled her close. His lips hungrily took hers and his tongue slipped into her mouth and she was lost. With each deep kiss, it was as if Haley was falling and falling fast, but she couldn't let him have this, not this. It was time she took control. Haley pulled away and gave him a cocky smirk. With all her strength she shoved Nathan up against the wall, her hands raking up his chest into his hair. Their kisses were violent and quick, but soon became slow and mesmerizing. Haley pulled away and looked up him, his blue eyes clouded with lust. "I don't need you to love me, Nathan," He cocked an eyebrow. "Because I won't ever love you."_

_"Seriously?" He asked softly. _

That was the moment she made her biggest mistake. Nathan never fell in love with her because he knew that the feelings would not be returned. It was a lie of course, because even then she was in love with him. They never truly defined what they were, because it would just complicate things more and Haley didn't want that. Sometimes they would be friends, and other times they would be lovers, but never a couple. It was hard, but Haley was willing to risk pain just to have Nathan in her life. He was her weakness and she was unable to fight it.

When had things in life become so dysfunctional? Haley never wanted a life that would be complicated, but that is what she got. Time was running out for her, though. Nathan was leaving for college in the morning and she was going to tell him how she felt, even if it made no sense and was completely irrational. At least he would know that she did truly care about him. It was time to say goodbye to Nathan.


	3. Chapter 3

_You can't always get what you want_

_But if you try sometimes you just might find_

_You get what you need - The Rolling Stones_

This moment was inevitable and Haley knew that. She stood awkwardly next to Nathan, waiting as he said goodbyes to his parents. You could tell by the gleam in his eyes that Nathan was glad to be leaving home. Haley, of course, could not blame him. She knew how Dan and Deb were, but everyone knew that. She always blamed them for Nathan's deep insecurities, and even though she did not know them, her heart held nothing but hate for them. After they all hugged and said goodbye, it was her turn. At first words seemed to fail her, but she had to say what her heart was telling her. No matter how hard that was going to be. "I cannot believe your leaving..." Haley murmured. "Please Nathan, take care of yourself."

He gave her one of his famous smiles and nodded. "You know me James, I'll be safe." It was no use trying to hide the tears or the pain, Haley was going to miss him. "Haley, I don't think we are ever going to see each other again." Honesty was something Nathan never truly understood, but Haley could tell that he was being sincere.

Was he right? Were the never going to see each other again. "At least we made the best out of the time we had." Nathan laughed softly, causing Haley to look up. "What, you don't think we had some good times?" It was easy to hide fear by making jokes.

"No, we had a lot of great times, but that doesn't change anything. When I'm gone, I'm gone. I won't come back here." She nodded in understanding. "I believe that when you have a chance to escape from the things that haunt you, that you should do it. For as long as I could remember, I wanted to be far away from here." He gazed at his familiar surroundings, taking it in for one last time. "Look, I know I am going to regret this, but I have to tell you something..." Haley's stomach fluttered with anticipation. Was Nathan going to say the three special words she longed to hear? "I'm glad you never gave up on me, but in some ways, I wish you did. We don't mean anything to each other. You were told to help me and you did your job, but maybe we should have just given up in the end. We let those physical attractions get in the way, and I regret that so much."

Haley felt ill. This was not the way she envisioned the day going. Nathan was supposed to tell her that he was in love with her and then they would be happy, but no. She thought that she should get an award for being insanely stupid and naive. Stupid - idiot - ass - ugh! "Right, we totally made a mistake." She said through clenched teeth. "I should have just done my job and not have slept with you. That might have made things A LOT easier." Haley laughed uneasily.

"Things wouldn't have been easy." Nathan said with a hesitant laugh. "There was a reason we never crossed paths until last year. I really cannot stand you." Ouch. Nathan really was just laying it all out on the table. "You cannot stand me either, so I guess we are alright."

Actually I am in love with you, Haley thought to herself before responding. "Right, you really are an ass." Nathan shrugged his shoulders and leaned up against his car. "So, you finally gonna tell me where you see yourself in the next couple of years?" Haley questioned hopefully. Her pain was unbearable and she just wanted to escape into a black hole, but she insisted on running her mouth.

"Who knows. I am just taking things as they come." He breathed in deeply, running a hand through his hair. "All I know that where I am going, who I was in Tree Hill doesn't matter. All the mistakes that I made here and all the people that I hurt, it's all forgotten.." Haley rolled her eyes, but the ones he hurt would surely remember. "I'm either going to crash or I'm going to burn, but I'm going to make these decisions myself. No one is going to influence me."

It was strange how open he was being, but Haley wasn't going to push the issue. Instead she just listened. "I thought a lot about what you have said to me and I think I finally get it."

"Oh? Well what did you learn 'Oh Wise One'?" Haley replied playfully.

"Just - everything you said made sense. I always thought that people who dreamed were weak and afraid, but really they are the strong ones." Nathan bit his lip nervously. Words never were his strong point, but that was not going to stop him. "People like me, Haley - we need to change, because who we are is not exactly admired, but people like you should never change. Promise me that. Don't ever change who you are."

How could she make such a promise? Change was an inevitable part of life, but Nathan looked at her like it was the most important thing in the world. "Is that really what you want from me? You don't want me to change?" Haley asked, inching closer to him. "Nathan, I'm just Haley James. There is nothing about me that is special."

"Your an idiot." Nathan responded quickly. "Why don't you ever give yourself credit? The things you say and the feelings you feel in your heart, they all matter." It seemed so unlike Nathan to be talking this way. Usually he was harsh and sarcastic, but all Haley could see was sincerity. "Well - " He coughed. "I guess it's time for me to getting going..."

"Oh yeah, of course. I don't want you to be late for whatever basketball things you need to do!" She responded with a big, genuine smile. "Good luck, Nate."

Her chance was gone. It wasn't the time to tell him how she felt, and it probably was never going to be the right time. All she was left with were memories and in a sense that was all she needed. Nathan gave her a hesitant smile and with that he was gone.

As she watched him drive away and out of her life, all Haley was left with was a bitter sadness in her aching heart. "I love you..."

_-Ten Years Later-_

Time is known to help you heal. You become aware that living in the past is only going to bring you down and you move on. The day Nathan left, was the day that Haley James changed. Her promise to Nathan couldn't be fulfilled, because a broken heart had left her a wounded soul. Sure, she put on a great act for people, but in reality she felt as if there was nothing left for her in life. As the years passed, Nathan became nothing but a distant memory. Whenever she would see him on TV after a big game, her heart would beat fast and she would be reminded of everything. Nathan was what she predicted and it made her laugh.

His life was typical and in no way was surprising. Nathan graduated from Duke University as the most sought after basketball player. Every team got him and in the end he played for the LA Lakers a team he always loved. He was successful and as far as Haley was concerned, he was happy. But then again who wouldn't be happy if they lived such a glamorous life? Haley on the other hand was much different.

Haley's life was her work and she really had no time to dwell on glamour or appearance. It took many years of school, but in the end Haley graduated and now worked at a hospital in Boston. It was a hard life, but she enjoyed helping people and it made her feel good. Sometimes she wanted to thank Nathan for it. Helping him was what helped her decide what career she should take.

"Haley, are you listening to a word I'm saying?" Her best friend Brooke whined. Haley met Brooke while in college and despite how opposite they were, they clicked instantly. Having someone like Brooke was good for Haley and she was thankful that they found each other. "Andrew is being such a pain in the butt. I think I am just going to dump him and be on my way. Like hello, I am a fashion guru and he treats me like I'm five."

"I don't know why you put up with him." Haley stated, stirring the straw in her drink. "Brooke, you can do so much better."

The brunette smiled and gave Haley her infamous "Duh" look. "Well I know that, but he is hot as hell and he buys me things!" Haley couldn't help but laugh, typical Brooke. "Enough about me Missy Poo, what is going on with you and what's his name..."

"Paul." Haley finished. "Things are - things are - things suck basically. I am so beyond bored with him and he drives me crazy. We never agree on anything. When I want to eat out, he wants to eat in. Hot and cold. I can't stand it!" She slapped her forehead in frustration. Men should not be this confusing, not at 28 years old. "I have come to the conclusion that I am going to die alone..."

Brooke laughed and hit Haley playfully on the shoulder. "If you die alone then I will become a cat lady. Which won't happen." Haley rolled her eyes while she blew a stray piece of golden blonde hair out of her eye. "You just haven't met the right guy. No one really gives you what want you want and they aren't what you need. I can safely say that Paul is a lost cause and you seriously need to dump his ass, or I will be forced to do it for you."

"Right, I will get straight on that Dr.Phil." Haley hated admitting that Brooke was right, but what could she do? Paul was lame.

"Actually, I think that I am more of a Dr. Ruth." Brooke winked and took a sip of her coffee. "Seriously, I could have a tv show and everything. It would be the greatest thing in the world."

Haley couldn't help but break into hysterical laughter. "Whoever is stupid enough to take sex advice from you is demented."

"You have taken my advice on a few occasions..." Brooke protested. "I mean if it wasn't for me, you would have never discovered how wonderful a vibrator is!" Her voice was quite loud and it caused a few people to stare.

"Brooke!" Haley hissed, her cheeks red from embrassement. "I am going to KILL you."

"Oh whatever."

-------

"Come on, baby." She purred into his ear, draping her bony arm around his neck. "I know you want me."

Nathan looked at the gorgeous woman in front of him. Standing in only a bra and panties, she was more the willing to fill his desires, but despite it all, he felt nothing. Usually the booze clouded his thoughts and he would sleep with girls who meant nothing, but being sober really changed what he wanted and WHO he wanted. He was almost 30 and it was pointless to still be living the bachelor lifestyle. Nathan wanted more out of life, but no one was willing to give him a chance. "Look, I want you to go." The girl pulled away and looked at him strangely. "Seriously, get the hell out of my house or I am going to call the cops."

After years of basketball and even though he retired, his lifestyle followed him. It was never supposed to be about sex and booze, it was supposed to be about the game. Sure, he played great games and was highly respected, but it never mattered, because each night he came alone to an empty house. Nathan watched as the skinny blonde left in a huff and he smiled. She really was irritating.

This was not the life he expected having, but then again Nathan was never sure what he wanted. Sometimes he wished that he never left that day. That he would have stuck around and listened to more of what she had to say.

Haley James changed him in a lot of ways. She instilled such a passion and zest for life in him and Nathan was nothing but thankful for it. There would be moments that he felt he owed Haley everything he had, but even that could not justify how much she helped him. Sure, he became everything she said, but he had more in life. The little things in life held more importance then they had in the past and Haley always told him to really take in the earth's beauty. Back then Nathan thought that she was nothing but a starry eyed dreamer, but she really was so much more.


	4. Chapter 4

**"_Love is when you meet someone who tells you something new about yourself." Andre Breton_**

_"Why are you doing this?" Nathan asked with annoyance. It was clear that he had no desire to talk with some kid in his class, especially her. She was not in his world, not deemed worthy enough to be in his presence. Haley James was the epitome of the wrong type of girl. Sure, in reality she was the girl most desired to be, but to Nathan Scott she was a failure. Her clothes were not revealing and she was short and her hair was certainly not bleach blonde. Haley James was not ugly, but she was in no way the most gorgeous girl Nathan had ever seen. Describing her as average was an understatement, because Haley was not that. She was a girl that held such a classic beauty that putting it into a category seemed foolish. Her hair was pulled up into a pony tail and she wore little makeup, but her beauty was visible. Nathan could remember once watching a movie with his mom when he was younger and the actress in it was Audrey Hepburn. Haley always reminded him of her. But Nathan was not attracted to Haley, because she didn't meet his perfection. _

_Sighing, Haley placed the notebook she had been scribbling in on her lap. From time to time she liked to write down different lyrics she had been thinking up in her head, nothing really special. "Nathan, we have been meeting for a week now. You ask me this question every single day."_

_"Well, I'm curious." He said leaning back into his seat. There was something that intrigued him about Haley James. Maybe it was her complete lack of attraction to him, or maybe it was the fact that she cared so deeply and they barely knew it each other. Whatever it was, Nathan was fixed and he was curious. "You barely know me and you say things so personal. Do you honestly think you can trust me?"_

_She smiled at him warmly. "I don't trust you, but maybe in the future I will." _

_"Alright, I am completely confused." He stated. Why did this girl have to be so damn annoying? "You don't trust me, but you will tell me secrets about yourself? How in the hell does that make sense?"_

_"Well, I guess it doesn't." Haley replied back mysteriously. "I tell you things because I am hoping that you will open up with me. Learn to trust me." Deep down she knew that the walls Nathan had built up were strong. No one was able to break them and see what made him tick, but she was going to figure it out. "I have an idea." _

_Nathan groaned. Haley's ideas were always stupid and made him admit stupid secrets about his past. Today had not been a good day and the very fact that he had to be sitting there in an empty classroom with Haley James was annoying the hell out of him. "I am sure I am going to love it!"_

_"Your sarcasm is really a turn on. I bet you get all the ladies that way..." Haley said as she rolled her eyes. She was baffled at how Nathan Scott had dozens of women at his beckon call. He really was irritating. "When I am really bored I like to look up quotes and I love applying them to how I feel and how my life is. I guess what I was thinking was that maybe you could tell me a favorite quote of yours and how it relates to your life. Then I would tell you mine..."_

_Why was God putting him through such pain? Of all the lame ideas in the world, Haley James was actually going to make him think. "Sounds fine with me, but can you go first?" Nathan asked. "I have to think about this for a second."_

_"Oh, sure!" Haley said happily. Finally, he was actually doing something she asked. All she could hope was that he took it seriously and said something meaningful. It was doubtful, but Haley had hope. "Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice, and most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."_

_In an eerie way, that quote meant more to Nathan then he thought it would. He never really was much for following his own beliefs. It had always been about what others thought and felt. "How does that relate to you?"_

_"All my life I have been taught to be myself. This world is constantly trying to change us and make us these - robots, you know? They want us to think the way they tell us and feel the way that is most logical. My parents always told me and my brothers and sisters to be ourselves. Don't let anyone tell us how to live our life. They told us it was okay if we failed because failure is just another name for experience." Haley shrugged her shoulders and let out a soft laugh. "I just learned not to care what people say."_

_Nathan couldn't help but smile. Every word she spoke was nothing but truth and even though he would never admit it, he loved hearing what she had to say. "I guess you want my quote now, huh?" She nodded giving him a smile."Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." _

_It has been said that people will surprise you. Never in a million years had Haley expected Nathan Scott to say something so heartfelt and true. Admitting that he was a brainless jock was now completely out of the question. He was simply brilliant. "Nathan..."_

_"I know, it's pretty stupid, but I just always liked it. My - uh - my mom always told me that when I was little." He laughed as he looked at the floor nervously. "It really is true though. When you are able to say what you want and you know that person won't matter because it's real, that's how you know you have something special."_

_---------_

The day had been uneventful and Haley was beginning to get irritable. Friday night and she had nothing to do, but that in itself was no surprise. After her brutal break up with Paul , things had been - dry. Dating just seemed foolish, even though Brooke insisted that she go out and plays the field. Really, what was the point? Searching for that "perfect" guy only caused more stress and Haley did not want stress. Not only was it unbelievably cold outside, but they were talking snow. Sure, it was pretty and all, but being a doctor, she wasn't able to just miss work because there was about 10 inches of snow on the ground. Thankfully she had a neighbor who had a crush on her and he always shoveled her drive way. As soon as her shift was over, Haley decided that she was going to curl up on her comfy couch and watch Oklahoma .

_"When I take you out tonight with me Honey, here's the way it's gonna be. You will set behind a team of snow-white horses. In the slickest gig you'll ever see._" _Haley sang to herself as she wrote in her book._

_Nathan looked up to see the girl sitting on a desk, her legs swinging back and forth as she sang. "Chicks and ducks and geese better hurry. When I take you out in the surrey..." _

_"Do not tell me you were just singing that song?" Haley questioned with a laugh. "Holy crap, you like Oklahoma?" Nathan was never one to blush, but he was sure that he was crimson. _

_Yes, he liked Oklahoma. It always put him in a good mood. Musicals had a funny affect on him. Never would he admit to anyone that he owned a few. Well, actually he owned more then he should, but it was a guilty pleasure. "Oklahoma, where the wind comes sweepin' down the plain. And the wavin' wheat can sure smell sweet. "When the wind comes right behind the rain," She belted out, causing Nathan to break out in hysterical laughter. "No laughing you need to finish the song!"_

_"Hell no." He replied stubbornly. "Just because I like it does not mean I am going to sing it. No way." Haley rolled her eyes and grabbed his arm, pulling him up out of the chair. "Hales, come on." _

_She giggled and he knew that there was no way he was going to escape this. "There's a bright, golden haze on the meadow. There's a bright, golden haze on the meadow. The corn is as high as an elephant's eye. And it looks like it's climbing clear up to the sky." _

_"Oh, what a beautiful Mornin'. Oh, what a beautiful day. I've got a beautiful feelin' .Everything's goin' my way." Nathan sang softly, just loud enough for Haley to barely hear. Why was he being forced to humiliate himself? "I hate you for this."_

_"Shut up you are having fun. Do you know Sound of Music?" She asked. "What am I saying? Of course you do." This was priceless, Nathan Scott liking musicals. "Hm, what song should we sing next?"_

_Nathan sat back down his seat, crossing his arms over his chest. "How about no more singing?" _

_"Oh fine, but I will so get you to sing the entire Oklahoma song with me. One day..."_

_--------_

When had life become so predictable? Every decision he made felt pre planned, thought out, and that was not how Nathan wanted to live his life. It was supposed to be mysterious and exciting, but his life was far from. The women he dated were predictable, the people he hung around, predictable. Everything in life was the same. Never was he able to shock and awe people the way...the way she did. Haley once again plagued his mind. Her beautiful face and soft brown eyes haunted him. Forgetting her seemed so easy, but it ended up being the hardest task of his life. Nathan always thought about that Jim Carrey movie, how he had his girlfriend erased from his memory because the pain was just too much. Sure, Haley was never his girlfriend, but they shared so much that at times he wished he could forget it.

Their passion was undeniable, and they did in fact act on it. But even then it hurt way too much to have anything real with her. Nathan knew what Haley wanted, because on one occasion they let themselves be completely vulnerable and share something personal.

_The heavy rain splashed against the window as they sat in the dark. Haley had thought it would be a brilliant idea if Nathan spent the night over her house. It was some weird bonding thing, he assumed. She even offered to pay him so that he would come. Anyway, halfway through the night the power went out and there they were, sitting in the dark with a dozen or two candles, talking. Her face reflected beautifully from the candlelight, but Nathan was not about to tell her that. "You don't have to stay. I know that you didn't want to come here in the first place."_

_"Nah, I'll stay. Besides my parents have been fighting a lot more then usual, I really don't feel like listening to their crap." Nathan mumbled as he played with one of the candles. _

_"This incense you are burning smells like ass..."_

_Haley snorted back a laugh. Typical Nathan, always negative. "Whatever. I like how it smells. Nobody asked your opinion."_

_"Whatever." He mocked. _

_"Why do you always have to be so mean to me?" Haley asked softly, her eyes soft and sad. "I am just trying to be nice and you always rip me apart. If it's not the incense I burn, it's the clothes I wear or my hair. It's always something. You are no better then me Nathan."_

_Maybe she was right, but Nathan didn't feel like answering. "Cry me a river." Haley stood up quickly and walked into the bathroom, slamming the door to give Nathan the full of affect of how angry she really was. He wasn't sure how long he sat there, taking in the silence. Why did he assume that just because they were talking that they were going to be friends? _

_Things did not work that way. After a good hour Haley came out of the bathroom, her cheeks tear stained. "Feel better now?"_

_"Screw you." She fired back. "Nobody likes an asshole." Her words did not hurt him. It wasn't as if he had never been called that. "Why can't you just give me a chance? I want to help you. Maybe learn a thing or two from the Great Nathan Scott."_

_He laughed coldly, picking at a piece of fuzz on his sock. "I can't teach you anything, Haley."_

_This girl was brilliant and she was witty, what things could she possibly want to learn?"Do you believe in true love?" Haley nodded. "Well, if you believe it, then tell me what love is to you."_

_"Are you going to laugh at me if I tell you?" Haley questioned. There was no way she going to spill her heart to Nathan Scott if he was just going to use it as a joke. He shook his head. _

_Haley took in a deep breath, for some odd reason she felt quite nervous, a very unfamiliar feeling. "Love to me is just being able to be comfortable with that person. They see you for what you really are and they won't expect you to be perfect. They love your imperfections and they find it endearing. It's when you can relate how you feel for someone in a song and it makes you feel good. Love is silliness and it's just - simplicity."_

_Nathan gaped at her, his whole body tense. "Do you think you will ever find that?"_

_"Who knows. It's easy to have all these ideas about love, but it will probably completely change when I actually do fall in love. Things in my life are really never what they seem." Haley sighed as she hopped up on her bed. "I will probably fall in love with a guy who makes me so angry that I can't even see straight, one of those karma things or whatever." Nathan laughed, this girl was completely nuts. "I really want to fall in love, Nathan." _

_It was moments like this that Nathan wished he was some romance guru. How are you supposed to respond to a statement like that? "Then why don't you?" _

_"Well, for us simpletons it's not that easy. We actually have to find people who are willing to give us a chance. Sure, you may meet that person but in the end it might not be love." _

_Haley explained. "It's all so complicated." She laid her head back on her pillow in exasperation. "Love should just be simple and easy for everyone."_

_Nathan shrugged looking out the window at the howling storm. "I guess it just gets easier with age..."_


	5. Chapter 5

_**"For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else." Ralph Waldo Emerson**_

When one makes a mistake, they are forced to deal with it for the rest of their days. Those memories plague them and haunt them and all they are left with is an aching feeling in their chest. Nathan was no stranger to mistakes. In his life he had made many, but there was one mistake that he made when he was seventeen that would forever haunt him. If he had known the repercussions of his actions he would have never acted, but he was unaware and the moment happened. Regret was not the word he would choose to describe his feeling for the situation that changed him forever. It left him with a sense of longing, but it also brought great sadness. Nathan Scott was not good with sadness. It angered him that his heart was feeling something that he promised would never be there, but you can't control what is meant to be.

_Funny thing about high school is that everybody talks. They are constantly in need of knowing what is going on with the popular kids. Nathan, of course, was always the talk of the school. Every one knew the latest girl he had slept with it, or about his infamous parties, and he was okay with it. Gossip was something he could never escape, so he just chose to take it. Nathan hated to admit that he ran his mouth from time to time. It had to do with the fact that he needed people to admire him and envy him, but right now he was not being admired._

_Sleeping with Haley James was never on the top of his agenda. He in no way planned it and he was in no way happy that everyone knew about it. The moment he walked into school Monday morning, his best friend Tim ran up to him and began questioning him about his erotic night with Haley. Nathan couldn't deny it, but he wasn't going to admit that he slept with her. All he did know was that Haley James was going to be pissed._

_"I am going to freakin' kill you." She shouted in the middle of the crowded hallway. Haley was never one to draw attention to herself. She normally hid in the shadows and stuck to her little group of friends, never really letting her self be known, but she sure had everyone's attention now. "If you are not in that classroom in less then one minute, I am going to chop of your balls and staple them to the damn wall!"_

_There was collective sound of "Ohhh" and "Ahhh" when Haley marched up to Nathan and grabbed him roughly by the arm, dragging him into the empty classroom. "Who the HELL do you think you are?" She huffed. Nathan began to speak but Haley smacked him across the face, easily shutting him up. "No, you will not speak unless I tell you too. Got it? Good. "_

_"Look, what happened between us was a mistake and I regret it. After it happened all I wanted to do was bury it, but NO. You had to open your big mouth and tell the whole damn school that you boned me. Right? Yah, that's exactly what I thought." _

_It was clear that her anger was not going to subside anytime soon, so Nathan stayed quiet. _

_"Why do you insist on being such a dick?" Haley questioned angrily. "I would never hurt you Nathan." She admitted softly, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "Why do you always have to hurt me and make me feel so low?"_

_"Haley, listen..." Nathan begged, but she wouldn't. There was nothing he could say to fix it. Nothing that would make this horrible memory be erased. "I didn't mean for it to happen this way. You really think that I wanted people to know about us?"_

_Haley let out a low, bitter laugh. "US? There is no 'Us' Nathan. You made that perfectly clear. I know that you don't care about me, but there is something I do know. People are always talking about the latest girl that you screwed and you don't deny it, but yet you deny even knowing me. I know that I am not considered cool by your standards or whatever, but I still have feelings. Sure, I act like what you say to me doesn't matter and that it doesn't hurt me, but it does. After our first meeting together, I went home and cried for two hours because you completely tore down everything that I believed in. Never have I questioned your beliefs, but you do it to me every single day."_

_"Then stop trying to be my savior. I don't fucking need you, Haley. I don't need you and I sure as hell don't WANT you." Nathan said his tone harsh and angry. "I've told you time and time again, I don't fall in love. I can't be what you want and I won't ever be the guy you talk about. " _

_He looked over at Haley who was now crying. "What do you want from me, Haley?" He cried out desperately. "Please, why can't you just leave me alone? I won't change."_

_"Fine, if that is how you want it, I guess there really isn't much more I can say." Haley whispered as she grabbed for the doorknob. "You'll come back when you're ready. You can't stay away..."_

Where had he gone so wrong with her? Perfection was staring him right in the face and he chose to ignore it. Stupid. Haley was infuriating and she had all these habits that got on his nerves, but Nathan loved it. He loved her. Sure, it took him years after he left for college to figure it out, but deep down he knew it was always there. Falling in love with a girl was something Nathan never planned on. It was too difficult to let your heart and your emotions take complete control. Haley was a feeler and Nathan was a thinker. They just did not see eye to eye, but that in no way meant that he was not completely in love with her.

She made him laugh with her eccentric personality and corny jokes. Haley made him think. She challenged things that for so long he thought were right. Everything was perfectly designed for him to be with her. All the events leading up to the very moment he left for college were perfect, but for some idiotic reason he chose to ignore them.

Being without Haley was scary, but being with her was even scarier.

-------

Snow was funny in the sense that it made adults feel like children. It brings out a feeling of renewal and everyone needs that from time to time. Haley hated to admit that she missed Nathan . She desperately wanted to know if he was okay, if everything in his life was good, but most of all she wanted to know if he was happy. For quite some time Nathan treated each day like it was a burden, nothing would make him smile. He would merely sit in his familiar seat and stare out the window. Haley always tried to tell a joke, or a funny story, but nothing ever broke through those tremendous walls he had put up.

Looking back it all seemed like such a waste of time, but Haley knew better. Even though Nathan hardly spoke at first, she knew he was listening. There would be moments when he would stare her down with such intensity. It was obvious that he was searching for something in himself, some clue as to what his purpose was, and Haley hoped that he had found it. Not having that kind of security must be painfully heartbreaking and Haley couldn't bear if Nathan felt that.

As the snow fell on the ground, Haley let out a peaceful sigh. It really was _magical._

_It was there first day to meet. Haley was always looking for extra activities to partake in during and after school and this was just another program. A teacher would assign a student who seemed upset or trouble, maybe even sad to a person who was willing to spend a little time talking to them about their problems. Haley was unpleasantly surprised to see Nathan Scott on her list. She was sure the basketball coach had convinced Nathan to take in this because teachers talked about him quite a bit. Still, she was not sure why she had to be assigned to him. No good could possibly come of this._

_"Hi Nathan. I'm Haley James." She said politely, extending out her hand for a nice friendly handshake. Haley wasn't surprised when he didn't say anything back, but turned to stare at the window. It had been snowing all day and it was really beginning to look like they were going to see a decent about. "It's pretty isn't it?" Haley said quietly, gazing out the window. _

_"Snow is so magical don't you think? It makes me feel like I can just start over. You know a clean slate?"_

_Nathan looked over at her, cocking his left eyebrow. He was not amused and apparently he did not find what she had to say insightful. "I take you really don't want to be here?" Haley asked sitting down next to him. Nathan shifted as he felt her tiny body rub against him. This girl just did not get the hint that he was NOT in the talking mood. "Okay," She huffed. "We are going to do things this way. Look, I know you don't like me and we have never talked before, but someone thought that you should be here. Your coach said you have been kind of - well he called you an ass, but I was going to say unkind." Haley giggled, but Nathan still did not respond. _

_"I saw a horror movie that started this way. Are you sure you aren't Damian? You kind of resemble him a bit..."_

_They sat in silence for a few minutes, but Haley was beginning to become annoyed. There was no way she was going to waste an entire hour in silence. It was physically impossible. "_

_Alright, stand up." Haley demanded. Nathan, of course, just said there. "Are you deaf, or just stupid? I said stand up." She said with her hands placed firmly on her hips. "Look, either you stand up or I will kick you in the nuts and then after you cry for a good couple of minutes, then you will stand up. Which way will you have it ace?"_

_He slowly stood up, his arms followed across his chest. Haley quickly took his hand and dragged him out of the building and out into the freezing cold snow. Nathan looked at her as she quickly ran away from him. His immediate reaction was to run back inside, but before he even got the chance to move he was hit in the back of the head with a snowball. "Hell no." _

_Haley's laughter could be heard from a mile away. She was cracking up, tears of mirth blurring her vision. "What, are you going to a little pansy and just stand there?"_

_"You are SO dead." Nathan yelled as he quickly made his own snowball._

_"Oh! He speaks. Hallelujah Lord!" Haley said with a wink. "You won't get me Nathan. I am a girl of many skills."_

_Nathan threw the ball as fast as good and he was surprised that it hit her right in the face. For a split second he felt bad, but then Haley ran and tackled him. Not only was his head cold and wet, but now his whole body. What a great way to end the day. "I told you I had a lot of skills."_

_"Yah, well I am sure I will learn a lot about you in the next year..."_


	6. Chapter 6

_"I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best." Oscar Wilde_

_"I do not get the point of this movie, Haley." Nathan murmured as she gave him her best fake shocked face. "Seriously, why are they talking about coconuts?" _

_Apparently Nathan had never seen Monty Python and The Holy Grail, which devastated Haley._

_So she immediately ran to Blockbuster and rented it, forcing him to sit and watch it. Nathan really lacked a sense of humor, because he was just not laughing. That baffled Haley even more and she was ready to kill him! "Nathan, it's funny." She pointed out, popping a piece of popcorn in her mouth. "Have you ever seriously, just laughed so hard you almost peed your pants?"_

_"Um, yah, no." Nathan responded. "I am afraid to ask if you have ever done so, but I am thinking I already know the answer." He smirked._

_Haley rolled her eyes and focused her attention back on the movie. "I don't want to go on the cart!" She said, imitating the old man on the movie. "I love this movie, it seriously the best thing ever. Well, this and Oklahoma, oh and The Lion King."_

_"How old are you?" He teased. "The Lion King? Come on, that movie came out so long ago."_

_This boy seriously did not know how to have fun. "Lay off the Lion King, mister. It is a Disney classic." Haley threatened. "Please tell me you have seen The Lion King."_

_Nathan looked away from her. Haley sucked in her breath dramatically. "Well, don't act so surprised."_

_"I CANNOT BELIVE THIS!" She shouted. "I - I - I am at a loss for words."_

_He rolled his eyes and took a handful of popcorn. "That's new." Haley smacked him playfully on the arm. "Look, I never really had time to watch movies when I was little. My dad was constantly making me practice basketball. I lived and breathed it. The Lion King does not really fit in with basketball."_

_"Ugh, I still cannot believe this. I am too afraid to ask what other movies you haven't seen. I might go into cardiac arrest and I sure as hell know you won't save me." Haley teased. Nathan couldn't help but smile at her. She really brought out a side of him that he never felt before. Haley taught him that it was okay to act like a little kid again, to enjoy the simple things in life. "Can I kiss you?" _

_"What?" Nathan whispered. There she was her full, perfect lips. Just screaming at him, but he couldn't do it. Haley was a nice girl, he couldn't let himself be with her. But she was there, willing. "I - I dunno." Before he even had a chance to say anymore, Haley placed a soft kiss on his lips. It lingered for a moment before Nathan's hands moved to cup her face and take her all in. Kissing Haley was like kissing a goddess. She was simple, but powerful. Innocent but seductive. Haley James was the perfect woman and Nathan could not resist her._

_He couldn't resist and he wasn't going too._

--------

"What is going on with you, Haley ?" Brooke questioned, twirling her fork in her garden salad. It was Haley 's lunch break and Brooke demanded they have a nice lunch. Of course, Brooke had other reasons for this impromptu lunch. "Is it a new guy?"

Haley let out a laugh. A new guy? Try an old guy who just won't leave her damn mind. "Not exactly..."

"If you don't start talking in the next, I don't know, ten seconds I am going to kill you."

How could one tell their best friend about a love they wish could be buried? Haley breathed in deeply; it was going to be a very long day. "When I was in high school, there was this guy.  
His name was Nathan and we had this really - complex relationship. Most of the time we screamed at one another, but there would be these rare moments when things were wonderful. He was everything I wanted in a guy, but he just didn't see it."  
Brooke nodded, clearly wanting to hear more. "When we would fight he would say some of the cruelest things. Mostly about how he would never love me, or that I wasn't good enough, that kind of thing. But I never really let it bother me, I just fired right back. I lied about not loving him and not needing him in my life and in the end I lost him. He left for college and I never saw him again."

"Wow, Haley ! How come you never told me this before?" Brooke asked. It was so unlike Haley to keep secrets that were so important. She usually told Brooke everything, but not this.

Haley shrugged her shoulders and took a sip of her coffee. "I tried to bury it, you know? Nathan brought me a lot of pain over the year that I spent with him. He was a pain in my ass and sometimes I just wish I could have hated him, but I was incapable of it. There would be this moments when we would just be sitting there, and he was stare at me with his amazing blue eyes and I swear, Brooke. He really saw who I was. Nathan actually valued what I had to say and he listened. More then most people did back then, anyway."

It was surprising how Nathan still had this affect on her. The very fact that it had been 10 years did not really make a difference; he was always going to be in her heart. You really just don't forget people who have impacted your life like that. "I have these moments where I just want to call him up and just ask how life is."

Haley laughed. "Pretty stupid huh?"

"Call him." Brooke said. Haley cocked an eyebrow, not amused by Brooke's sense of humor. "I'm serious, Haley. This man is the love of your life. You have to call him."

Saying it seemed so easy, but the very act of calling Nathan made Haley ill. "I can't do that."

"Why not?" Brooke asked fiercely. "Scared?"

Haley sighed and looked at her friend. "Yeah, I am."

------

Nathan glanced at his phone. How hard would it be to call her up and just see if she was alright? They had been so close and it seemed strange that he hadn't spoken to her for 10 years; a simple telephone call was okay - right? Sighing, Nathan took a long sip of his vodka. Maybe if he was a little bit buzzed the fear of calling her would subside. Did he really have anything to lose? It wasn't as if they say each other everyday. A simple call to let her know he was thinking about her...

No.

Telling Haley James that he was thinking about her would be foolish. She was the type of girl who would never fall for his lines or romantic gestures. Haley James wanted the real thing, and Nathan knew that was where he lost her. How could he be the real thing when he wasn't even sure what the real thing was? Love was not supposed to be this complicated. It wasn't in high school. "Dammit." Nathan muttered, picking up the phone. "Yah, operator, can I have the number for Haley James . Boston, Mass."

Oh God. It was ringing. He was going to be speaking to Haley James in a matter of seconds. Maybe it was a bad idea? They hadn't spoken in ten years and their goodbye was not exactly pleasant, what if it was all too much? It was now or never...

"Helllllooo." Her voice giggled sweetly. "You've reached Haley James . I am not here. So leave me an awesome message and I will call you back. Because I am in fact awesome myself! Oklahomaaaaaaaa!" She sang at the end, causing Nathan to smile warmly. Haley had not changed one bit.

He heard the familiar bleep and he was suddenly at a loss for words. "Um, Hi." He barely managed to get out. "It's uh - uh. Nathan - Nathan Scott . I was just calling to see how you were doing. I know this probably seems really random and strange, but I was just - well yah. Maybe you could call me back and we could talk. I am going to be in Boston for a little while next month, so maybe I will see you."

Ah, he did it. "Oh and Haley , Oklahomaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" He sang back. "You made me promise, so there you go."

It was over. He left a message. Oh God, he left Haley a message.

What the hell was he thinking? Nathan smacked his forehead and took another drink. His life was officially over.

Not only did he leave a message, but he freakin sang Oklahoma on the damn phone. There was no way she was going to call him back now. Probably thinks he is crazy.

"I hate myself." Nathan mumbled, throwing his cell phone across the room.

------  
It took a lot to shock Haley James . She had seen many strange things over the years, but a phone call from Nathan Scott had knocked her on her ass - literally. There she was sitting on her couch, watching the Sound of Music and she hears that she had just received a voicemail. Thinking it was Brooke , Haley listened without any worry, but boy the voice she heard changed that.

Nathan .

Her Nathan .

Well, he wasn't exactly HER Nathan , but in a sense maybe he was? Anyway, it was shocking and she was in no way prepared to handle it. No only did he sing their song, but he said he wanted to meet up with her. How could he just ask that so - so nonchalantly?

Haley felt that she was going to go and get some heavy pain killers because a sudden headache just started.

She was torn between what to do. There was no way she could just ignore the phone call, but maybe she could say - no. She had to call him back. But what if it was all a mistake?

Life had just changed for Haley and she was in no way ready to handle what was too come.


	7. Chapter 7

_**An Entrapment**_

My love, I have tried with all my being  
to grasp a form comparable to thine own,  
but nothing seems worthy;

I know now why Shakespeare could not  
compare his love to a summer's day.  
It would be a crime to denounce the beauty  
of such a creature as thee,  
to simply cast away the precision  
God had placed in forging you.

Each facet of your being  
whether it physical or spiritual  
is an ensnarement  
from which there is no release.  
But I do not wish release.  
I wish to stay entrapped forever.  
With you for all eternity.  
Our hearts, always as one.

- Anthony Kolos - 

Fear is a very tricky thing. It can keep even the bravest of souls from having what they want. Haley wished desperately she had the strength to fight for him, but it all just seemed like a disaster. Ten years was a long time and it wasn't as if they could just pick up from where they left off. Besides, how they ended things was not on the best of the terms. They loathed each other, or at least he loathed her. Haley wasn't even sure what Nathan felt for her. Maybe he didn't feel anything at all? This was why his calling was disastrous, it brought up past feelings and that wasn't good.

Would it really be horrible if she called him back? Two old friends getting reacquainted, simply platonic. Right, that was all it is. They were friends, or something of that sort, so it wouldn't be completely crazy if she called him and asked how he was. Oh God, what was she thinking? Calling Nathan was like calling for her reservation at the cemetery. This was not going to end well. But blowing off was completely out of the option. Nathan went out of his way to give her a call, and it would be insanely rude and stupid to ignore him.

Even if she actually decided to go through with calling him, what would she say? Haley sighed loudly, leaning back in her desk chair. Life was not supposed to be like this. The decisions should not be so life changing. Calling Nathan changed her life; not calling Nathan changed her life even more. "UGHHH." Haley yelled, slamming her fists on the desk.

"Someone kill me, now."

Her eyes glanced over too her phone. She was always taught to do things when the fear was the strongest, just put yourself on the line and jump. Haley rolled her eyes. Now was not the time for her to be remembering her mom's crappy advice.

It was time to call him.

If her life was going to end, it might as well be when she was prepared for it. Her hands trembled as she dialed his number. As she listened to his obnoxious ringback song, Haley let out a soft smile. But then her smile quickly faded when Nathan answered the phone.

"Hey?"

Oh my God. "Um," Haley mumbled. "Er, I." Great, she sounded like freakin' Forrest Gump . Ten years and she couldn't even form a sentence. Haley slapped her forehead in frustration.

"Oh Shit, OW!" She yelled into the phone.

"Are you okay?" Nathan asked, chuckling. "You were kind of talking to yourself..."

Did he know it was her? Because he was being extremely calm and cool, and she was freakin' smacking herself upside the head. "I'm - uh - fine." She squeaked out. "Oh my God, I am so freakin' stupid." Haley groaned, not realizing that she actually said that, it wasn't just in her head.

"Um, I don't know what to say to that..." Nathan responded tentatively. "So, Haley James ," He said with a smirk. "I see you are still a bit on the strange side." What, is he kidding?

Even after ten years he is still cracking jokes. Well, HA. Haley James had some jokes of her own.

" Nathan Scott , still think you are funny?" Haley fired back; satisfied she could keep up with his antics. "Right, so anyway. You called me last night and I felt that I should be polite and call you back. My mom always taught me to call people back, no matter how random the phone call may be. Well, I didn't have to call back crazy pervs who liked to breathe heavily into my phone, BUT that is not important."

Nathan laughed, causing Haley to scowl. "I know you enjoyed those pervy calls." She snorted. "Look, how about we not act like we are 17 and seriously have a conversation?"

When she didn't respond, Nathan carried on. "How have you been, Haley ?"

"I'm good. Life is just - well you know how life is. Stressful, but I am managing. I work a lot." It was strange how easily the conversation flowed. Funny how it felt like things haven't changed a bit in ten years. " Mr. Scott , the big time basketball player. Did everything I said."

He sighed, running a hair through his hair. "Yep, I did. I guess I have you to thank for it all."

"I did nothing but tease you about it." Haley responded softly. "You did it yourself and I'm proud of you. I always knew you were going to do something great..."

He smiled warmly. That girl had his heart and he couldn't deny it. "What about you? Are you a big time doctor like Dr. Gregory House ?"

"Oh God, you remember that?" Haley said laughing.

"Of course!"

_Haley sat on Nathan's couch, watching intently at what was happening on her favorite show. She giggled as House said something completely sarcastic, it was amazing. Nathan hated doctor shows and could not believe he was watching it. What if he had one of those freaky diseases and was sentenced for an early death. "OH MY GOD!" Nathan yelled, covering his eyes. "Haley, this is fucking gross. Why are we watching this?"_

_"Oh stop being a pussy." She said with a smile. "It is not that bad, you just have issues." _

_That girl really was a piece of work. "Anyway, I want to be a doctor and I love this show. House is so amazingly sexy."_

_Nathan blinked. Was she serious? "Haley, he walks with a cane." She looked at him strangely. Apparently she did not see what he was seeing. "Besides, he is old."_

_"Who cares?! He is amazing." She said dreamily. "Chase is pretty fine too, but Wilson. Gah, I love him."_

_What in the world was up with this girl? She was either insanely crazy or really horny. Either was fine for him. "I see. Well, I guess if that is what you are into you. You must be one of those girls who like the smart guys." Nathan murmured, a strange feeling bubbling in his stomach. Oh, what if he was dying. No, that was stupid. He was being stupid. "Can we please watch something else?"_

_"Like what?" Haley asked as she paused the show, not wanting to miss a minute of it. She had to admit it was a bit strange that she was sitting in Nathan Scott's house like nothing was wrong, that this was perfectly normal. Maybe it was?_

_He sighed, looking at her nervously. "Uh, how about The Lion King?" Nathan whispered, his cheeks bright red._

_"AH! Well, I brought it because I was going to make you watch it anyway. I still can't get over the fact that you haven't seen it. "Nathan smiled and gave a sigh of relief."Oh, and because I know you oh so well. I won't tell anyone about this. Even though Disney movies are the best and you don't need to be embarrassed..."_

_Nathan rolled his eyes and lay back on the couch. "Haley, just start the damn movie." _

_A half hour later they were both sitting next to one another, Nathan's arm hanging loosely around Haley's shoulder. It was so normal for them, that neither one of them noticed just how intimate they were being. "This is the best movie ever." She mumbled, placing her head on his shoulder. "Ah, I love this song." She said when "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" came on. "It's so pretty."_

_"Yeah, it is." Nathan said softly, looking down at her. _

_They sat in silence for the rest of movie, Nathan glancing at her every few seconds. Being with her was perfection, nothing could ruin this moment._

Haley laughed as Nathan recalled the memory; he of course left out the staring part, but the rest he told. "You know, I just watched that movie last week." Sighing, she tired to think of what to say next, there were so many questions but so little time for explanations. "Were you serious about meeting up next month?"

"Of course." Nathan replied softly. "I think it's been long overdue don't you?"

There was no turning back now; she had to fight her fear. Let herself be in Nathan 's life once again. No matter how painful it was and how scary it was going to be, Haley knew this was something that had to be done. "Just give me a time and place."

--------

It was going to be a good day. Nathan was absolutely sure of it. Haley had agreed to have dinner with him when he was in town, and everything was going to perfect. Hopefully she wouldn't say something that would make him angry, because Lord knows she had a habit of doing that. No, he wouldn't that happen, he had to prove to Haley that he had changed, but old habits die hard. Whenever they were around each other, there would be these moments when things got really hostile, and it made him mad. But it wasn't going to be like that this time, it was going to peaceful and romantic and perfect. Well, at least he hoped it would be.

"You seen happy today, Nate ." Lucas stated. "You called her didn't you?"

Nathan rolled his eyes. Sometimes he just wanted to punch his brother right in the face. "Not that it is any of your business, but I called her. We are going to have dinner when I go to Boston in a month."

"Good job, Nate . Seriously, I am so glad you are finally doing something about your life. You need some happiness." Lucas gave his little brother a smile. "Just don't screw it up."

Would he be able to fix his wrongs? Show Haley that he had changed and was willing to fall in love with her, or maybe fall even deeper in love? Nathan wasn't sure what tomorrow was going to bring, but he was glad that she was going to give him a chance.


	8. Chapter 8

_"There is one pain I often feel, which you will never know. It is caused by the absence of you."_

People tend to have unrealistic expectations about key moments in their lives. Everything can be planned out perfectly, but it is just set in stone that something is bound to go wrong. Maybe that is to show people that life is never what it seems. It's those totally unpredictable moments in life that make your experiences ten times more enjoyable. Well, that may be for the rest of the world, but for Haley James - not so much. She had her evening with Nathan perfectly planned out; they would have a nice dinner and some casual conversation, nothing messy. Karma- it was the only option she could come up with for how the evening was going. Firstly, her hair was just not doing what she wanted. Sure it looked decent, but it was in no way spectacular and she had a cold, so that just added on to all the mess. Not only was she in a pissy mood, but she realized something, Nathan Scott had NOT changed. He was being his stupid, inconsiderate, seventeen year old self and that did just not fly. "Are you kidding me?"

"No?" Nathan responded, sipping his drink. "Haley, come on. You seriously can't be serious."

She laughed, rolling her eyes. "I am dead serious. You are so - ugh. I cannot believe I freakin' agreed to do this." Nathan sighed, now chugging down his alcohol. "Stupid me, I actually thought you changed. Sure, you were all cordial and sweet on the phone, making me remember the not so good days, but then we meet up and it's high school all over again."

"You still whine." He muttered. "Look, tonight was not supposed to be like this, but you make me so damn angry." Nathan sighed. "This was a mistake, I think."

A sharp pain hit her heart and she felt tears welling up in her eyes. No, this was not supposed to be like this. Nathan was not supposed to be this. She wasn't supposed to be like this, feeling that familiar pain all over again. It was all supposed to be different. "Right, well you do realize that you were the one who called me."

"I was lonely." Nathan replied snidely. "Maybe it was just a booty call?"

Haley sucked in her breath, gripping the edge of the table in anger. "You were always kind of freaky."

Haley took her glass of water and threw it on his face. HA, Nathan Scott was not going to make a mockery of her. At first he just sat there not saying anything, but then he picked up his glass of water and threw water in her face. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" She shrieked, wiping her eyes. "Great, you ruined my dang makeup."

"Whatever, this shirt was expensive and now it's all wet." Nathan said as he glared at the other customers who were currently watching their antics with great interest. "I should just leave you right now and you can take the bill."

Haley snorted. "Sorry, but that is not going to happen." Nathan rolled his eyes, quickly pulling out his credit card. This night was clearly over. "Hey Nathan, how have you been feeling lately?"

"Fine. Why do you ask?" Nathan responded uneasily. Oh God, he was really dying this time. She was going to tell him he had some strange, rare case of herpes and there was no cure!

She shrugged her shoulders. "You look a little bit - odd." Haley was trying not to burst out into a fit of giggles, but this was just too priceless. Nathan was looking around nervously and he looked like he was about to pass out. She knew he had a fear of diseases and it was so wonderful toying with that. "Have you seen a doctor lately?"

"No..." He whispered. "What?" Haley turned away, which only caused him to become more nervous. "Am I DYING?!" He shouted. "What is it? Tell me. I can take it."

Haley sighed, lowering her head. "Nathan, I'm sorry but I think that you have - Youareanassflumitosis. It's highly dangerous and you will suffer with this disease for about, well - the rest of your life."

"Oh my God, what do I do?" He questioned, clearly not getting the whole gist of her joke. Nathan frowned when he saw Haley laughing hysterically. "Wait, there is no such thing as Youranassflumitosis. OH, I get it now." He murmured. "You are not funny." Haley nodded, still laughing. "I knew it was all a joke.. I just was playing along, yeah."

Sighing, Haley leaned back in her chair. "I guess I am going to head out of here. Dinner was - dinner sucked. You are on your way to being completely smashed and I am not in the mood to deal with you anymore." She didn't say much, but quickly grabbed her coat and walked out the door, leaving Nathan wet and stunned.

Why did she have to be so stupid? Nathan couldn't be nice to her. It was his default setting to treat her like she meant nothing to him, but maybe she didn't? As she sat on the bench, taking in the scenery she felt a body sit next to her. "Haley, look I'm sorry."

"It's okay. We don't really know each other anymore, Nathan." As Haley breathed in the cold air, she could feel Nathan's eyes on her. "This is just how we are. It's how we have always been. We would fight and then the next minute you'd have me pinned up against your bedroom wall."

Nathan cringed. The way she put it made it seem like it meant nothing. "I really have changed..."

"Have you?" She fired back fiercely. "Because I don't believe it. You acted like the boy who I fell in - who I let take advantage of me." Haley corrected herself, hoping to God Nathan didn't know what she meant. "I'm glad we had this chance to see each other. When two people shared such a - complicated past, it's silly that we at least didn't call each other. Nathan, we really did share a lot with one another. Remember when we sat out on the beach that one night and we told one another our fears and our dreams? We let ourselves be so vulnerable and in pain, but it was perfect."

Nathan couldn't help but smile; this was his Haley. This was the constant dreamer who let him into this world of wonder and love. Sometimes he wished he could understand where the faith came from, but he lived it through her. "I remember everything." She looked up at him, her eyes shining with tears. "Seriously, every word you have ever said to me, I remember. The first day I met you, we went out in the snow and you threw a snowball at my head" Haley giggled. "I hated you for the fact that you made me, I don't know, want to have a life that was more than just what it was already. You were my best friend, Haley."

"Ah, well what can I say?" She replied, brushing off her shoulder jokingly. "This has been an interesting night. I'm cold and wet and I take it that you are too. Nathan chuckled. "I take it you are leaving tomorrow?"

He sighed, another goodbye. "Yeah, I just had some business to take care of up here." Why was it so hard? Nathan had to admit to himself that he was in love with Haley. He was so in love with her that it actually hurt, but there was nothing that he could do. Telling her how he felt just seemed absurd, they were so far from who they use to be. i"It's been a weird night, don't you think?"/i

"It's always weird when we are together." Haley admitted softly. "Well, I guess it's time we say goodbye."

Nathan breathed in deeply. She wasn't fighting; she was simply letting it all go. "I guess so..."

"You're doing okay." She gave him a hopeful smile. "God, we are so dysfunctional." Nathan laughed softly, knowing she spoke the truth. "We go from really awkward, to screaming at one another, to a heartfelt apology."

"That is just how we have always been..." It was hard admitting the fact that things with them were so unorthodox. Nathan wanted to believe that something between him and Haley would work, but in all honestly it just seemed hopeless. They caused one another so much pain and it was not right. They both deserved happiness and there was a good chance that they weren't going to find it in one another. "Never a dull moment with Haley James."

She smirked, brushing a piece of her golden blonde hair behind her shoulder. "Yep, everyone is super jealous." It was so easy to pretend. The pain of feeling vulnerable was just way too much to bear and Haley couldn't handle it. "Sometimes I wish I never met you..."

_Nathan Scott was known for his parties. They were infamous, but Haley didn't really care for it. Funny how life is; she now found herself at one these parties, feeling extremely uncomfortable. Nathan had invited her in passing and she stupidly agreed to show up, but she felt that she owed him this. Haley sighed when she saw Nathan flirting with one of the cheerleaders. Sure, they had kissed a few times, but she wasn't stupid enough to really believe he cared about her. Haley grabbed her jacket from where she placed it and quickly put it on. The beach just seemed so inviting. It was a beautiful night; the sky was clear and you could see every single star. It was the perfect night for a little romance._

_"Are you always this antisocial?" Nathan asked with a cocky smile. "I invite you to my house and then you just disappear."  
Haley rolled her eyes, digging her feet deeper into the cool sand. "I just do not find drunken teenagers appealing. My apologies." Nathan laughed and sat down next to her. "Why do you do it?" _

_"What?" Nathan asked confused. He hated when Haley acted vague. "Oh, I take it you mean this whole lifestyle. The parties and the sex, all of it?" Haley nodded. "_

_"It's just easier, you know? Sure, I could be like you and step outside of the box, but it wouldn't do me any good." He let out a heavy sigh, admitting things about his life were never easy. "Not everyone is as brave as you, Haley."_

_"I'm not brave." She admitted softly. "I'm just afraid of failure." _

_Nathan desperately wished that he understood Haley's logic. "Haley, you are brave. Trust me. I've never met someone with more strength and wit than you. You do what you want and say what you feel. That is a brave person. If I said half of the stuff on my mind, well, I would probably be crucified." Haley chuckled, playing with her hair nervously. "Half of the people that I am forced to be around, I can't even stand."_

_"Been there!" Haley said with a smile. "Seriously, people are so - so I can't think of a good adjective to describe them, but honestly, they really all suck." Nathan couldn't agree more. It was a constant thing in his life, with people wronging him and making him feel like he didn't matter. Haley had always made him feel like he was somebody, and that he did matter. "I've just learned that when you aspire to be different, life isn't going to be all peachy keen. People are going to ridicule you and they are going to tear you down, but you have to be strong."_

_The way she said it, so free and strong, seemed unbelievable. "You make it seem so simple." Haley shrugged. "Look, I have to tell you something."  
"Alright, shoot!"_

_Nathan was never one to be nervous, but sitting here on the beach and gazing into Haley's soulful brown eyes- it was overwhelming. "In one of my classes we had to write a paper on who we admired most." Nathan breathed in deeply. "I wrote about you, Haley."_

_"Wha - why?" She asked softly. "Nathan, I don't know what to say." _

_"You don't have to say anything."_

Haley sat in her apartment, thinking back on the events of her night with Nathan. It had been interesting, yet very much needed. He was a wonderful man deep down, but so much heartache and pain kept him from being the person he truly was inside. She sat in front of her closet, holding a box full of letters. A smile appeared on her face when she found what she was looking for- the paper that Nathan had written about why he admired her. Haley was shocked that he had chosen to write about her, but it made her feel worthy. All she wanted was to help Nathan; she wanted to make him see that he was a good man, and the very fact that he wrote a paper about her showed it.

_Who I Admired and Why._

_I know that a lot people are going to choose athletes or musicians, maybe even their parents, but not me. There is a girl that I know she really is a wonderful person. She taught me so much in such a little amount of time and it amazes me. Some may not see what makes her so special, but I do. Haley James is a girl who isn't afraid to be herself. She never lets the weight of the world pressure her into a life that she doesn't want to be living. Haley is who she wants to be and no one can change her. When I first met her, I honestly didn't get it. The way she saw things always gave me a headache and I never understood why she thought life was so great, but then I realized something. Haley isn't meant for this world; she is meant for something so much better. I sometimes wish she knew how smart and witty she is, but I believe that her not knowing keeps her humble. Haley is the most compassionate person that I have ever known. No matter how angry someone makes her, she still wants to see something good happen to them._

_Everything that Haley is, I admire. She can laugh when things aren't even that funny, and she will cry with you when life is tough. I can remember this one time we were driving somewhere, and this really strange song came on. Haley just began singing; she didn't have a care in the world. People like that should be admired because they are who they are and they don't care. The people in this world don't matter because they don't have her inner strength and confidence.  
Haley James is a special person and I thank God everyday that I know her._

Tears blurred her vision as she put the paper Nathan wrote safely away. What happened to the girl she use to be? The girl who didn't have a care in the world and was able to walk around and not care what people thought? Haley sighed, realizing that she had changed dramatically over the years and she couldn't help but regret it.

Could having Nathan back in her life bring her back to the girl she use to be? Only time would tell.


	9. Chapter 9

"**_Love comes to those who still hope even though they've been disappointed, to those who still believe even though they've been betrayed and to those who still love even though they've been hurt before."  
_**  
"I'm serious, Brooke. It was awful. I threw water on him." Haley bit her lip to stifle back a laugh. Brooke just sat there in horror, not even sure how a date could go so wrong. "Then we talked afterward like it never happened."

Brooke sighed, grabbing the nail polish she was currently using. "I really don't understand your relationship with this guy. He treats you like crap, yet he treats you like you are a queen." Haley sighed. Was that true? "He is obviously too scared to admit his true feelings for you. Maybe he feels like he isn't worthy enough?"

"Who knows." Haley mumbled into her pillow. "Brooke, it's just - I can't let him go. No matter how hard I try, I want Nathan in my life." Brooke sighed loudly; apparently Haley was too far gone. "He has been calling me since the date. I haven't answered or anything because I just don't even know what to say anymore. Being with Nathan hurts because he makes me admit that I am not who I thought I was. He forces me to reveal who I really am."

The brunette couldn't help but feel her friend's pain. Sure, Brooke had guys, but never had she let them take over like this. "Haley I have to ask you a really important question. Do you -"

"I love him, Brooke." Haley admitted without any hesitation. "Not just that regular 'I love you crap', but the kind that makes me want to scream at the top of my lungs."

Brooke couldn't help but laugh. "Hales, I love you, but that was the cheesiest thing you have ever said in your entire life!"

"Oh shut up. I was feeling giddy." Haley groaned, laying back on her bed in exasperation. "This isn't going to go away is it?"

As they sat on her couch watching old movies and enjoying one another's company, Haley heard a knock on the door. "Who the hell - ugh, I bet it's Paul. He has totally switched into stalker mode on me."

"Ew! Don't answer!" Brooke protested. Haley didn't listen and walked up to the door. She might have only been in a pair of sweats and a Duke basketball shirt, but she was not about to try and impress Paul. He was so pathetic. "Ugh, you know what? Fine. When you are dead I will not be making your eulogy at the funeral, because I will probably be dead too!"

Laughing, Haley opened the door, but the person who she saw was not Paul. "Nathan?"

"You weren't answering your phone." He whispered.

Brooke gaped at the man standing in the doorway. That was Haley's man? Damn, that was Haley's man. A smile spread across her face, showing that she knew this was about to get interesting. "Nathan, I was - busy."

"Look, I feel like such a tool. I want to take you out right now and go have fun. Dinner was a disaster, but I really just want to take you out and be like how we use to be."

Haley blinked, maybe she was dreaming? "You mean back to dysfunctional?"

"Yep, that is exactly what I mean."

Haley turned to look at Brooke, who was currently wrapped in a blanket and trying to look as calm as possible, but she knew on this inside that Brooke was dying with excitement. Brooke nodded and told Haley to go, which only annoyed Haley more. How was she going to spend the rest of the night with Nathan Scott and survive? This was either going to be a disaster or the best night of her life. Haley was truly hoping for the latter, but with Nathan she was never sure how things would go.

Brooke watched as they both walked out of the apartment. When they left, she immediately picked up her cell phone and dialed. "Lucas, yeah it's Brooke. I have to say, you are a genius..."

They sat in silence as Nathan drove to his unknown destination. She looked over at him and couldn't help but smile. They were both wearing Duke t-shirts and it showed how alike they were. Haley couldn't help but love him more. Plus, he looked so cute. Maybe it was the way his hair wasn't all gelled up. It was just tossed all over the place, but he still looked amazing. Haley sighed; she was falling so hard and there was no one there to catch her. It was strange to be there with him now after the disaster of a date they had, but maybe things were going to be all right. "Tell me, Ace. Where are we going?"

"If I told you, would it make you be quiet?" Nathan fired back with a smirk. "Kidding. I am taking you somewhere fun."

Haley rolled her eyes and looked eagerly out the window. She hated surprises and clowns. Hopefully there were no clowns involved. Nathan pulled up to a dimly lit place and Haley felt slightly worried. "Alright, I'm scared and confused."

"Can you ice skate?" Nathan asked as he hopped out the car and walked around to the other side to open Haley's door. "I found this place last week and I thought it looked like fun." Haley looked at him skeptically. "Don't worry, I checked the ice. We are not about to have some Titanic scenario."

She giggled, sometimes he knew her so well. "I'll never let go Nathan..."

"I'm the king of the world." Nathan replied, uninterested, as he put on his skates. "Honestly, why do we always quote movies?"

Haley shrugged. "It makes us special!"

It was strange being there with Nathan, feeling like she was seventeen again. Haley knew that being there was risky. She was letting her heart feel so much, but it was a risk she was more than willing to take. "We need music!" Haley replied happily as she popped in a mix cd that Nathan had in his car.

_Life is beautiful  
We live until we die _

When you run into my arms  
We steal a perfect moment  
Let the monsters see you smile  
Let them see you smiling

Do I hold you too tightly?  
When will the hurt kick in?

Nathan looked at Haley and his heart ached for her. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Everything about her was special and unique. and he regretted never seeing it until now. Ten years was an awfully long time but he needed her. "Hales," She looked up at the sound of her nickname. "Give me your hand." Haley held out her hand and Nathan grabbed it, squeezing it tightly. "God, you're gorgeous."

"Nathan..." She whispered. "I - I don't know."

He gave her a warm, but hopeful smile. "Don't think about it. Don't think about who we were or where we have been. It's here and now. Just us. Together. For this one perfect moment."

"I wish it were that simple, but life isn't like that."

_Life is beautiful  
But it's complicated  
We barely make it  
We don't need  
To understand  
There are miracles  
Miracles _

Yeah, life is beautiful  
Our hearts  
They beat and break

"You changed, Haley." Nathan replied with hurt in his voice. " I thought I told you not to change." He softly caressed her face. Haley longed to kiss him to again. Feeling Nathan was something she could never forget, and something she needed in her life. "I've missed you Haley James."

Haley choked back a sob. "I know." Sighing, Nathan pressed his forehead against hers, staring down into her eyes. "I thought about you everyday."

"We can't do this." Nathan whispered, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. "I wish we could, but we can't."

Haley pulled away from his grasp. He was always messing with her head and making her feel like she never mattered. "I'm going to go skate now."

_When you run away from harm,  
Will you run back into my arms,  
Like you did when you were young?  
Will you come back to me? _

I will hold you tightly  
When the hurting kicks in.

Nathan knew what he said had upset her, but he couldn't lie. Sure he wanted to be with Haley, but Nathan couldn't be who she needed. There was so much about his life he needed to change in order to be the man Haley needs. He watched as she skated around the lake, wiping fiercely at her eyes every few moments. Sitting on the ground, freezing, Nathan realized that he couldn't wait around, but he had to make things happen. He quickly jumped up and skated over to where Haley was.

"Nathan, I am really not in the mood. Could you please just -"

He wasn't sure what caused him to do it. What emotions motivated him to kiss her, but there it was. Kissing her was the single most perfect thing he had ever done in his entire life. They fit together like a perfect work of art; all of their colors contrasted to make such a masterpiece. Despite their differences, they fit together. Her witty humor and his laidback attitude made them the perfect match, although they couldn't see it. Their kisses were always slow and passionate. Even when things got heated, their kisses stayed slow. It left such a lingering taste that they would remember the kiss hours after it ended.

Haley was too shocked to react so she went with it, kissing him like she kissed him when they were seventeen. It all felt so right and wrong at the same time. Her hands ran through his hair as they fell back on the ice, Nathan quickly climbing on top of her. She let out a soft moan as he begin to trail kissing down her neck, slowly lifting up her shirt. His cold hands ran up her stomach to cup her breasts. Haley gasped, loving how it felt to have a real man touch her again. "Na - Nathan."

"You make me so hard." He huskily whispered in her ear. Haley smiled as she kissed him; it was time she took control. She slowly unzipped his jeans, letting her hands wander to stroke him. "God - Hales - you feel so good baby."

Her lips caught his once again and even though it was wrong, she loved feeling him.

_Stand where you are.  
We let all these moments pass us by. _

It's amazing where I'm standing,  
There's alot that we can give.  
This is ours just for the moment,  
There's alot that we can give.

Suddenly, it hit her. Nathan wasn't always going to be around and he wasn't going to change his entire life for her. "Hales, what is the matter? Why'd you stop?"

"I – I don't know." Haley replied honestly, running a hand through her now messy hair. "Things that feel so right have a habit of being what's worst for us." Nathan nodded in understanding. "I mean - I haven't seen you in ten years and when I do – all of this happens. I think taking it slow would be the best option."

Nathan gave her a smile. "I know what you mean." Haley couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief. At least he understood. "Alright Shorty, can I take you to the next place or do you want to go home?"

"Nah, I think I'll stick it out with you for a little bit longer."

"Oh man," Haley shrieked excitedly as she turned up the radio louder. "I love this song!" Nathan couldn't help but burst out laughing. Only Haley James would freak out over a Dean Martin song. "When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's amore! When the world seems to shine like you've had too much wine, that's amore!" She giggled. "I cannot believe you have this song on a mix cd. You are my hero!"

Nathan winked. "What can I say? I'm glad my choice of music could service you."

"Seriously, you have the best taste in music. I see that my influence helped, because I have not heard a single rap song. I am so proud." Haley wiped her eyes jokingly." Alright, now where are you taking me?"

"Do you always ask so many questions?" Nathan inquired.

Haley sat for a moment thinking. "Duh, of course I do."

"I'm not even sure why I asked that question." Nathan replied with a chuckle, pulling into the restaurant. Haley gasped when she saw where Nathan had taken her. It was the most expensive and elegant restaurant in Boston. "You're catching flies, Haley."

She shook her head, still amazed. "No way. Nathan, this place is way too much and I am so under dressed. And so are you!" Haley knew she was rambling, but this was just way too much. She hated when people spent a lot of money on her, especially Nathan. "Why are you laughing?"

"All part of my devious charm I suppose?" He replied as the walked up to the entrance. When he opened the door Haley was surprised to see that there was no one else there. "I paid them a little extra for it just to be us tonight."

Never had someone done something so nice for her. It all seemed like she was living another life because things like this were just not possible. Nathan was not supposed to be this wonderful and charming, but there he was. It was strange to finally have what she always wanted with Nathan, but in a way it didn't feel right. It was unbelievably scary to jump into something with him, she was not about to pass this up. Her heart was in risk of being mutilated again, but it was a risk she was ready and willing to take.

They sat in silence, drinking their wine and listening to the soft music playing in the background. Haley was sure that Nathan told them what music to play because all of her favorite oldies were playing. Her heart beat faster every time he looked up and gave her a sweet smile. When had Nathan become the man she always wanted?

_It was one of those long days that Haley dreaded. She knew that Nathan was going to be in a rotten mood because apparently someone did something sucky. She was also having a bad day, so it was obvious that a fight was going to break out. When Haley was walking to the classroom they always met in, something unexpected had caught her eye. There was Nathan making out with some girl from the cheerleading squad. Her heart tightened and tears formed in her eyes, but she couldn't cry - she couldn't. Haley quickly walked inside the classroom and sat down at one of the desks, opening up a book she was currently reading. _

Twenty minutes later Nathan walked in, and he looked God awful. She couldn't help but notice the amount of hickies on his neck. Ew. Haley gagged to herself as she continued to read the book, not even acknowledging the fact that he was there. Nathan picked up on her hostility and he was curious, but he was not about to ask her. Instead of trying to make civil conversation they both sat in silence.

"What is your deal, Haley?" Nathan asked with agitation. He didn't want to waste the rest of his day sitting in a freakin' classroom with some chick. "I know you saw me with her. Jealous?"

Haley scoffed. "Right, I'm jealous. I'm so jealous of the fact that you probably have herpes now." Honestly she was a little bit jealous, but there was no way she was going to admit that to Nathan. No way. "You can go home now. I will just tell Principal Turner that we had our meeting."

"I'm not leaving." Nathan replied stubbornly. "Apparently we are having a problem and we need to fix this."

She couldn't help but laugh. Nathan really was clueless. "Right, there is no 'problem' so whatever drugs you're on I suggest you lower your dosage."

"Why did you put 'problem' in air quotes?" Nathan asked with a smirk, mimicking her actions. It surprised him that Haley wasn't laughing or punching or him, or at least fighting back a little.

Apparently something really was bothering her. "What's up Shorty?"

Haley bit her lip furiously. Why did he have to pretend to care so much? "Nothing. It's just been a long day."

"You need to stop lying to me and to yourself."

She couldn't take it any longer. Haley grabbed her book bag and walked toward the door. "Nathan, do me a favor. Stop pretending like you care about me."

Haley sighed and looked at Nathan, who was now ordering his meal. Maybe he really did care back then?


	10. Chapter 10

**_"Kissing is a means of getting two people so close together that they can't see anything wrong with each other."  
_**

Feeling alive once again was something Haley longed to feel for ten years. The perfection of feeling wanted and admired brought such happiness to her lonely heart. It was the perfect night, the perfect kisses, and the all around perfect Nathan Scott . She never dreamed that they would be together for one night, reliving the moments of their past; good and bad. It all seemed strange, but  
Haley was enjoying it far too much to let it go. Nathan hadn't changed much in ten years. He was still the cocky, good looking, smart boy she fell in love with.

Haley sighed inwardly, listening as Nathan talked about how his life had been over the years. She could listen to him talk forever.  
It was strange. Nathan seemed to have the dreamer's outlook on life, while Haley wasn't even sure were she stood on how she viewed her life anymore. Nathan looked up at her and gave a hesitant smile. Haley smiled back, playing nervously with her gloves. After dinner they had decided to take a walk to a little park she visited frequently. "It all seems so surreal. Don't you think?" 

"I suppose so. Life in general is just a big mess of 'Who is judging me?' and 'What if's?' I really just feel confused, you know?" Haley replied back softly. The look Nathan gave her seemed pain, almost disappointed. Surely he didn't expect her to stay seventeen forever?

"What, you don't like my answer?" 

Nathan shook his head in protest. "No - no of course not." He sighed, leaning over the bridge to look down into the water. "It just doesn't sound like you."

"I'm not sure how I am supposed to sound..." Haley admitted." Nathan , I've changed -"

"No," Nathan cut in. " Haley I made you promise not to change."

Haley hated the fact that she had let him down, but he really thought too highly of her. She had faults just like every other person. "I'm sorry." Nathan shrugged his shoulders and sat on the edge of bridge, taking her hands in his. The moment his hands touched her, she felt her heartbeat begin to beat fast. "It's getting kind of late..."

"Who cares?" Nathan mumbled, his lips inching closer to hers. "Hales, I miss having you as my strength." He pressed his forehead against hers, looking deeply into her chocolate brown eyes. "But this has to end. I'm leaving tomorrow and I - I can't miss you like I have over these years." 

Pain was something that Haley wished she could be immune too. Losing Nathan once was hard enough, but losing him again was just way too much. "It doesn't have to end..."

"I live in L.A. " He murmured into her shoulder, loving the feel of her concern. "I'll call you all the time."

Haley wiped a stray tear from her eye and breathed in deep. "I'll be waiting for it."

Brooke couldn't help but notice the change in her best friend. The Haley she knew was always very reserved and quiet, but suddenly this whole new person has arrived. She was laughing and cracking stupid jokes and Brooke knew it was all because of Nathan . When

Haley returned home for her date, Brooke couldn't help but ask if they had sex. Haley blushed and replied no, but said they got pretty close. Brooke was beyond thrilled. Sure, she acted like she never knew who Nathan was, but in reality she had a very good idea.

Apparently she had met his brother during one of her many college trips and they began talking and then hooking up and then talking some more. In the end Brooke and Lucas became quite close and began to divulge a lot of secrets.

For it was Lucas would educated Brooke on the past relationship of Haley James and Nathan Scott and she was just ecstatic. A little annoyed at first that Haley didn't mention it, but she knew it was a personal subject. It became the personal chore of Lucas Scott and Brooke Davis to reunite these two lovers who had lost there way. Of course they succeeded, now all that was left for Nathan and

Haley to confess how they feel. "Feeling chipper today?"

Haley set her friend a hateful stare, but then busted out laughing. "Whatever. I am happy. Is that really such a crime?"

"You are more then happy." Brooke pointed out. "I would have to say that you my dear friend are in love."

Sighing, Haley sat down on the couch next to Brooke . "Look, I don't really know what is going on with Nathan and me. We have been keeping in touch, but I know this is just the calm before the storm. Things are never what they seem with Nathan ."

"Why does it have to be bad?" Brooke asked in annoyance. Haley was forever going to shoot down the idea of her and Nathan .

Haley looked out the window and frowned. "It just is."

_There were moments when Haley could feel that Nathan was beginning to slip away. He would have such high's and low's that she was unable to keep up. Sometimes she was afraid to even speak to him because she knew he would channel all his rage directly towards her. Today was going to be one of those days._

There had been rumblings throughout the school that Nathan and a huge fight with his father after Friday night's game. Haley didn't doubt it for a second that this happened, but she was way too afraid to bring it up. Nathan walked into the classroom, black circles under his peaceful blue eyes. For a split second Haley thought that he had been crying. "Hi Nathan." 

He looked up from the spot he was staring at on the floor. "Hi."  
Haley walked over to Nathan and, without saying a word, embraced him in a hug. She felt his body tense up at first, but soon he relaxed and let himself feel loved. His breathing was heavy as she heard him begin to cry. "What happened Nathan?"

"I - I don't even know, Hales." He confessed weakly. "My game was perfect. I did everything I was supposed to do, but he still ripped me a new one, called me a spoiled son of a bitch. He told me that I was never going to make it in college I kept playing like a pussy." Rage developed in her heart as she listened to Nathan confess the truth about his so called perfect life. "No matter what I do, it's never enough. NEVER. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother. He doesn't care about me, he never did."

Honestly, Haley couldn't relate to having a parent that didn't care. For the first time she truly felt grateful for her loving and sometimes embarrassing parents. "Alright, I have an idea." Nathan looked up and she could see the desperation in his pained expression. "Come over my house for dinner. My parents seriously don't mind. They think I have no friends...so maybe if I brought you over they'd get off my back!"

"Oh, I see. You're just going to use me for show?" Nathan chuckled in spite of himself. "I know I'm good looking."

Haley slapped him playfully. "Shut up! You need this Nathan and I really think that you will have a good time." He shrugged his shoulders in defeat. "I'm going to warn you, my parents are a bit - eccentric."

Nathan wasn't exactly sure what to expect when he reached Haley's house. She smiled when they walked inside. It was strange, the moment he stepped inside her cozy house he felt like this was were he always belonged. They heard a loud giggle and Haley groaned. "Oh my God!" 

She stalked off into the kitchen and Nathan awkwardly stood behind, not sure what was going on. "MOM! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" Nathan peeked into the kitchen in surprise. There was Haley's father sitting in a chair, while her mother was giving a - a lap dance! "I am so completely horrified right now that I seriously can't even be angry. Seriously, ew." Haley looked over at

Nathan who was actually blushing. "Lady formerly known as my mother, this is Nathan. Man formerly known as my Father, again this is Nathan."

"Uh, hi." Nathan murmured, scratching the back of his neck. "Uh - nice house." 

Lydia James walked over to Nathan and gave him a big welcoming hug. "Haley, you did not tell me your boy toy over here was so good looking!"

"Wha - WHAT?" Haley's mouth dropped open. "Mom, Nathan is not - God forbid my boy toy!"

Nathan snorted back a laugh, which caused Haley to glare at him. "Dad how can you just sit there?" 

Jimmy James shrugged and looked at his wife. "Now Lydia, I don't think we need to embarrass Haley any longer. When Taylor gets home -"

"WHAT?!?"

"Uh, did we forget to mention Taylor is home for a bit?" Lydia questioned with a smirk.

"Apparently her boyfriend kicked her out because she was getting high way too much. I'm not exactly sure on the details, but who cares."

Nathan was in complete shock. Never did he expect Haley's family to be so open and strange. They were completely lovable and he never wanted to leave. "Mom, I cannot believe this."

Suddenly the door opened and Taylor James made her grand entrance. "I am here party people." 

"I hate you." Haley murmured, crossing her arms over her chest. "Why do you insist on being such a pothead?" 

Taylor hopped up on the counter, eyeing Nathan seductively. "Who is this?"

"Don't even think about it." Haley scolded. "Nathan, I apologize right now for any sexual thing my sister may try and do to you. She is such a hoe face." 

Lydia laughed. "Haley, shut up and go show Nathan around."

"But no sex, okay." Jimmy added, causing Haley to blush furiously. "We have hidden cameras." 

"Kill me now." 


	11. Chapter 11

"**_Really great people make you feel that you, too, can become great." Mark Twain _**

Nathan thought that everything with Haley was going to be perfect. He would call her everyday and they would talk for hours about how life was treating them. It all seemed like the perfect, fool proof plan, but in reality it was so much more. Sure, he called her, but then he realized something. Hearing her voice, but not being able to be there in person was by far to hard to take. He was tired of the fact that he couldn't be with her, that there was always something in his way.

Sighing, Nathan placed his feet up on his coffee table, flipping through the TV. Ever since he had retired, life had been - well it had been boring. He found himself frequently sitting around and doing nothing, which was just not going to fly anymore. It was about time he made some changes in his life. Sure, they would seem drastic, but he had to do it.

Lucas walked into his brother's house, not surprised at the state of chaos it was currently in. When he returned back from Boston, Nathan was different. He no longer acted like a mature adult, but the irresponsible college student that Lucas hated. Lucas groaned when he saw the kitchen. Beer bottles and take out boxes all over the place. Geez, he didn't come over for a few days and everything goes to hell. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

Nathan looked up from his comfortable spot on the couch. "Do you got the time?" 

"Oh don't give me that shit, Nathan." Lucas fought the urge to roll his eyes. Nathan was known to be a tad bit on the whiny side, today was just one of those days. "You have seriously turned into Pod Nathan. Two months ago you were giddy and in love and now you're - well you are being a compete asshole." 

"Why don't you just shut the fuck up?" Nathan replied with irritation. He was in no mood to fight with his older brother, certainly not over his current behavior. If he wanted to mope around and be miserable, that was his God given right. "Seriously, it has been a rough day."

Lucas couldn't help but laugh. "Are you kidding me?" Nathan stared at him. "Nathan, you didn't do anything today. You sat around and played your stupid video games and then drank a lot." 

"What's your point? The Duke game is about to start..." 

He was flabbergasted. This was just unbelievable! "You are 28 years old. When are you going to grow up?" Nathan shrugged his shoulders, taking a long drink from his Scotch. "I know you miss Haley..."

"Lucas, don't even try and start that with me." Nathan growled. Apparently Lucas had hit a sore spot. "I do not want to talk about Haley James. Do you got that?"

There was something going on and Lucas knew it. He had been talking to Brooke and she was filling him on how Haley was acting. She was crying more then usual and being unreasonably mean, something completely out of character. There was all but one answer to this solution.

Nathan was breaking her heart. 

"It's okay to miss her..." Lucas told him. "You love her and I -"

"I don't love her."

Lucas squinted and sat down next to his brother. This was not normal. Nathan would never openly say he was not in love with Haley. No way in hell. "Are you kidding me?" Nathan didn't respond, but merely sat watching his game. "Alright, I didn't think I was going to have to do this, but I guess you leave me no choice." 

"What are you talking about Lucas?" Nathan asked confused. His brother was on something that was for sure. "Look, I really just want to be left alone - "

" You are going to move to Boston."

Nathan spit out his Scotch on the floor. "WHAT?" He slammed his glass down on the table. There was no way he was moving. Who the hell did Lucas think he was? Did he even have the right to ship him off to Boston? "I'm not going."

"Yes you are." Lucas argued. "I talked to someone and they are going to let you stay with them." 

"NO!" Nathan protested. This was absurd! How could Lucas just send him to Boston? He was not going to live with some stranger. No way in hell. "Right, well who will I be staying with?"

"Haley James."

--------------- 

"I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS SHIT!" Haley yelled as she slammed her bedroom door shut. What in God's name was Brooke thinking? Sending Nathan to live here? No no no no no. This was just completely insane and just not happening. OH, Haley was going to kill Brooke. No, not kill - something more painful. Sure, they had this wonderful night together, but then he just never called. Okay, maybe he called once, but that was it! It was all so clear as to why she could not stand Nathan Scott. They would have such great times together and then he would run away.

He could not stay in her apartment. Why would this work? How could Brooke even think this could work? "I HATE YOU BROOKE!"

"No you don't." Brooke said from outside the door. "Deep down you are so happy that you just want to sex him up right away." She bit down on her lip to stop from giggling. This was by far the best thing Lucas had ever conjured up. Her boy was such a genius.

"When is HE coming?" Haley yelled, frantically trying to clean up her room.

This was where it got messy. "Um, in about an hour..."

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?"

Brooke groaned and placed her forehead against the door. She knew Haley was going to be pissed off, but never did she expect it to be this bad. "Come on Hales, you love him."

"I DO NOT." 

"But you said -"

"I LIED!"

It when on like that for about five minutes. Brooke desperately tried to assure Haley that this was a good thing, that Nathan was completely thrilled about it. Haley couldn't help but roll her eyes at the bare faced lie. She knew Nathan and it was painfully obvious that he was in no way happy about this arrangement. "I'm going to die." 

"Stop being such a drama queen." Brooke replied with a cheeky smile. "You are going to be fine. It's not like he is going to be here for that long, maybe a week or month or maybe two - " Haley's mouth dropped open. " we will most certainly get on those itty bitty details later, but no need to worry! Brooke's got your back."

Haley groaned and buried her head under the mountain of pillows that she had put on her bed. "I can't be put through this emotional hell anymore. I spent my whole senior year helping him and being put through living hell, I can't do it again." 

"But you fell in love with him..." Brooke told her. "Apparently it wasn't as bad as you are making it out to be." 

Haley wished that she was overreacting, but in truth she wasn't.

Her past with Nathan was everything she described it to be. Sure, they had their nice little date a few months ago, but the past was always there. Because she was so desperately and pathetically in love with him, she let herself be used. When he wanted to have sex, she was there. If he needed someone to comfort her, she was there. It was so pathetic that Haley could not help but be ashamed of her behavior. Ten years later and it was all the same. "Brooke you have no idea."

"Enlighten me then."

_Haley giggled softly as she felt Nathan's arms wrap around her waist. He placed a soft kiss on her neck, but then he began to bite and suck hard. She turned to face him, their bodies molding together perfectly. Nathan licked his lips and kissed her hungrily. His kisses were something Haley never experienced before. The way he left her wanting more was just a pain in her ass. She could not want more from Nathan. It was obvious the arrangement that was going on. When Nathan had a bad day or no girl was around, he went to her. After they slept together that one stupid time, he thought it was his way in and in some strange way, it was._

She pulled away and looked up into his blue eyes, which were beginning to turn dark. "Why don't you want to be with me?" Nathan leaned in to kiss her once again, but Haley jerked away. "Answer the question, Nathan."

"Why can't you just fucking leave it alone?" He yelled, slamming his fit on the desk. "It's so fucking simple, but you need to make it so damn complicated." 

Tears blurred her vision as she slumped down on the floor feeling defeated. "I don't understand you."

"I told you before, I am never going to love you." Nathan spit out. "Just because we have sex doesn't mean we are anything. Do you get that?" Haley didn't respond, she just sat on the floor, staring up at Nathan. "God, why do you have to act like such a damn girl? It's just sex."

Haley laughed spitefully. "You are such an asshole!"

"Why don't tell me something I haven't heard a million times?"  
Nathan asked with a smirk. "Haley, look I know you were a virgin -" 

"Shut the fuck up."

Nathan smiled to himself, he knew he was getting to her. It was all one big mind came with Haley. He would use her, make her feel like she was everything to him, then he'd rip the rug right out from under her. "I am the only one who knows how you like it Haley..."

"Stop." She whispered painfully, blinking back the ocean of tears that were falling. "Don't do this Nathan."

He wished he could stop, but he wanted to hurt her. All the pain that he was feeling because she was such a frustrating girl was beyond his control. Nathan leaned up against the door and looked down at Haley, she was being so pathetic. "You're a fraud, Haley."

"What?" She choked out between a sob. "How am I a fraud?"

Nathan rolled his eyes in exaggeration. Was she really this stupid or was this all another act? "Don't act like a moron, Haley. You know exactly what I am taking about. You pride yourself on being this strong person, but a little thing like this is completely tearing you apart."

"I hate you." Haley yelled as she jumped up on her feet, prepared to go head to head with him. She stood up on her tip toes and slapped him right across the face. "I may cry and I may be upset, but it doesn't mean that I am afraid to kick your ass." Nathan grabbed her wrist and jerked it away from his face. "Just because you have a fucking horrible life doesn't mean you can take it out on me! I am trying to help you for God sake's and you sit here and make me feel like shit."

Haley breathed in deeply, not even close to being finished her rant. "What have I ever done to you?" Nathan looked away, but she grabbed his cheek and made him look her directly in the eye. "No, you are not going to run away. I want to know what I ever did to you." 

"Everything." 

Brooke sat there in complete shock. How could Haley be in love with such a prick? She could not get over the fact that Haley let herself be used and ten years later it was still happing. Maybe it was a mistake that she was bringing Nathan here? No, there had to be something good about him. "Haley..." She whispered. "Why didn't you ever tell me he treated you like that?"

"It's really hard to relive." Haley admitted with a small shrug. "Look, Nathan is a lot of things, but I know he never really wanted to hurt me." Brooke scoffed, but that didn't surprise Haley. Most people didn't understand why she never left Nathan.

"It's just really complicated."

"Duh." Brooke said with a smile. "I - I really am sorry that he is coming here..."

Haley waved her hand. "It's alright. Wait - no. It's not alright, but I don't hate you. I'm mad and will probably end up in jail for a DOUBLE homicide, but it's all good in the hood."

"There really is something there?" Brooke asked eagerly. "Because right now all I see is a sick, selfish bastard."

"Brooke, you have no idea..."

_Haley hated herself for crying over him. He was just a stupid guy who she was going to just forget about in a year, but still the pain was undeniable. Sure, she knew that Nathan was mean, but never did she expect him to be evil about it. There was nothing she had left, but to sit and write a song. It always helped her get over the crap that happened during the day. _

It was another Sunday and it was raining and it was just not a good day. Haley fiddled with her guitar a bit, trying to figure out the music. The lyrics were simple, but it was finding the right tune to fit those beautiful lyrics. She let out a heavy sigh and began to sing. "It's loneliest when you're here. It's quietly when you're right beside me. I don't say it to hurt you, I just miss the touch of his hand."

She had to force herself to hate him, but it was damn near impossible. "The loneliness is better near now. Than to satisfy the crave. The loneliness is better near now. Than to satisfy the crave, and start all over ."

"But I like fingertips on my face. The glances I can retrace in my mind. The holding onto me so I feel it and fall into it. Chase the memories away I know I'm not the same, but I'm wishful And I'm strained and strange. And though I won't complain I know I stray, I know I stay." Tears flowed freely down her cheeks and Haley didn't care.

"An ocean away. A woman at bay. She shoots up a flare and beckons him near and the closer you get the safer I am ,But the further I run to hide me in the dark..." She laid back on her bed, not even singing was releasing this pain.

"Who knew Haley James could sing?" Nathan replied from the doorway. He was soaking wet and looked pathetic, and Haley was glad. There was no need for him to be feeling any better then she was. No, he had suffer. "Can I come in?"

She scrunched up her nose in protest. "I'd rather you not. I just cleaned my room and I don't want your funky self all up in it."

"That's fair." Nathan replied as he sat down on the floor, leaning up against the door frame. "I really liked that song you were singing -"

" Just get on with why you are here." Haley replied annoyed. She was in no mood to hear Nathan apologize for the millionth time.   
Nathan let out a heavy sigh. He had a feeling that Haley was going to be difficult to handle, but he didn't think she would be like this.

Yes, he hurt her and made her feel like she was nothing but an object, but Nathan believed with his whole heart that she wouldn't think it was true. "I didn't mean what I said. Look, I was really angry Haley."

"It doesn't matter." She responded sit up from her spot on the bed. "I - I can't do this anymore."  
Nathan's heart began to beat fast. "You mean this whole counseling thing?"

"No, I just - I won't have sex with you anymore." 

_Nathan struggled to hold back a roll of the eyes. Why was she making it so complicated? "I - understand."_

"No you don't." She bit out snidely. "You don't want to piss me off."  


_He laughed softly, nodding his head in agreement. "That's true, but I am really sorry. Okay, so we won't have sex anymore..."_

"Does that mean you are just going to go off and screw other girls?" Her voice was soft and childlike, which surprised Nathan.

Was there a right answer to that question. Surely she didn't think that he would just - wait for her? They weren't a couple and they weren't in love. It was all about sex and using one another. As screwed up as the logic was, it seemed to work most of the time. "Haley - I - "

"It's okay." She mumbled, giving him a strained smile. "It was just sex."

Nathan cocked his eyebrow in confusion. Was she kidding? "Oh, alright. I guess we are cool now?"

"Yep."

Brooke had no time to respond, because there was a loud banging on the door. Haley looked up and fear could be seen in her eyes.

Everything was about to change. "Well, I guess we better go and get that..."

"I guess so..."


	12. Chapter 12

_**Paul Varjak: I love you.  
Holly Golightly: So what.  
Paul Varjak: So what? So plenty! - Breakfast At Tiffany's**_

_**Scarlett: Rhett, if you go, where shall I go? What shall I do?  
Rhett Butler: Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn - Gone With The Wind**_

There were plenty of emotions Nathan could be feeling, but the one he was feeling was odd. Excitement and fear plagued his heart, but he was ready for this. Yes, it was going to be a living a hell and Nathan knew that Haley hated this idea, but he had nothing left but this. The door swung open and there was the Brooke Davis , looking as fierce as ever. The minute she met his eyes, Nathan was sure that Haley had divulged on their past. He groaned inwardly as she kissed Lucas . " Nathan Scott ."

"You rang?" He replied sarcastically.

She scowled and walked inside the house, not even bothering to invite them in. Lucas turned to face Nathan , "I guess we should - yeah." It was strange being in Haley 's apartment, actually having to live with her. As far as he could tell, Haley was hiding. That didn't surprise Nathan , because he knew that she was deeply upset by this, because really, who wouldn't be? A heavy sigh escaped his lips as he stood there awkwardly, waiting for Brooke to appear. "Alright, so Haley has taken a vow of silence and will not be coming out." Lucas stifled back a laugh. " Nathan , you can go and do whatever," He eyed her strangely. " Lucas and I have a lot of catching up to do before I leave."

"What?" Nathan replied confused. Yes, he knew what they were about to do, but what is this about leaving? "Leaving for where?"

Her expression took on that of completely flustered. "I - I" she stumbled, turning toward Lucas . "I thought you told him!"

"I was going to!" He replied back. "I just didn't know how..."

Nathan wasn't dumb, he knew that there was more to this arrangement then they had explained. Neither spoke up at first, but then it was good ole Lucas . "Well, you see, Brooke is going to be staying at your place in California , while you stay here..."

"Fuck no."

Brooke scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Oh, you are being such a douche bag. Anyway, I'm just going to go grab my bags and Lucas , we are out of here!" He sighed. Someone wasn't getting lucky. "We will just have to induct you in the Mile High Club."

"Oh dear sweet Jesus ." Nathan muttered. Not only was he going to be living Haley , but he was completely alone in the matter. "I - I really hate you, Lucas ."

His brother winked at him and gave Brooke a smile when she emerged from the bedroom. "Well, I guess we are going to - bye Nathan !"

_And then there were two._

Awkward couldn't even begin to describe how Nathan was feeling. He was to afraid to even move, let alone start messing around in there. God, he hoped that Haley had some type of liquor; because that was the only way he was going to survive this personal hell. He heard a door slam and knew that the Devil herself was approaching. "Where the hell is Brooke ?"

"Uh -" Nathan blinked. How was he supposed to tell her that the only support she had in this was currently on her way to California ? "Well -"

Haley placed her hands firmly on her hips. "Where is she, Nathan ?"

"Currently?" He questioned. "Well, I guess I would have to say she is currently having sex in the bathroom of the plane that is going to California ..."

"WHAT?!" Haley shrieked.

"Woman, you need to calm down. She is living in my damn house. If anyone has the right to complain it's me!" Nathan pointed to himself. Ha, there was no way she was going to beat that.

She rolled her eyes and flopped down on the couch. "I am going to die."

"Drama queen." Nathan said with a smirk. "Should I start writing your obituary?"

There was no way he was going to be able to deal with this is. Sure, he was in love with the girl, but she made him way too angry. How was he supposed to live with her? Nathan couldn't deny the fact that she looked beautiful. Her hair was thrown up in a messy bun and she was in a pair of sweats and a Duke t-shirt, but she was gorgeous. "What do you have to eat around here?"

"Nothing fatso. I am on a fast." Haley said with a cheesy smile. "I guess you are going to have to go shopping."

Nathan groaned. Why was she making things so difficult? "Seriously Hales, I am freakin' starving."

"I think I have -" She hopped up off the couch and walked in the kitchen. "Hm, well apparently I do not shop that much, but we have ice cream!"

He made a face. "I guess that works..."

"Yum, okay!" Haley chirped back. Boy, that girl had a serious mood disorder. She could go from bitching to completely happy in a matter of seconds. Nathan wasn't about to complain, though. A happy Haley was better then an angry, psycho Haley . She came skipping back with a big bowl and two spoons. "What movie do you want me to put in?"

Nathan shrugged, not really feeling up to a movie. "Oh my God!" Haley giggled as if she thought of a brilliant idea. "I will be right back!"

"Okay?" He sighed. There was no use trying with Haley , because in the end nothing good would come of a relationship. A few moments later she returned, smiling slyly. She had something hidden behind her back. "What are you hiding, woman?"

She huffed in frustration. "Guess." A wide smile appeared on her face and suddenly Nathan remembered.

"Oklafuckinghoma." Nathan couldn't help but laugh, only Haley James . "Are you kidding me?"

Haley shook her head and put the movie in. "No, I am not." She was still smiling when she sat down on the couch, far away from Nathan . Sure, she was being nice, but they were no near ready for close contact. Not after the fact that he ignored her after their date. "Is this not the best movie ever?"

"I suppose so," Nathan muttered, his arms folded across his chest. "Boy, it's been a long time since I have seen this." It was nice being there with Haley , enjoying the last drip of youth in them. Nathan honestly couldn't remember the last time he just sat and enjoyed someone else's company. A smile couldn't help but appear on his face as he saw how happy Haley was. Her eyes were bright and wide and it was as if she was ten years old all over again. "I'm sorry about all this."

She shrugged, not turning to look at him. "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."

"I thought that was supposed to be my line?" Nathan smirked. She really thought he didn't know what infamous movie she was quoting. "Woman, you are no Scarlet or Rhett Butler for that matter." Haley giggled and crossed her legs to sit Indian style. "Lovely accident you got there, New Jersey ?"

Haley looked at Nathan for a moment and then broke out into hysterical laughter, she even snorted once or twice. "Screw Oklahoma we are freakin watching Dumb and Dumber. Nathan , I cannot - oh my God. I don't even know why it's so funny."

"She wrote me a john-dear letter...something about me not listening enough; I don't know...I wasn't really paying attention." Nathan quoted again, causing Haley to laugh once more. It was good that they did this, considering it was something in their past that was memorable.

"Oh!" Haley squealed excitedly. "I bet you won't know this one!"

Nathan scoffed. "Try me!"

"PC Load Letter - what the fuck does that mean?" She smirked as Nathan sat in deep thought. There was no way that Haley was going to beat him in their infamous game. "HA!" Haley laughed heartedly. "I got you."

He rolled his eyes. "OH!" Nathan shook his fist in frustration. "Dammit, I know this. OFFICE SPACE!"

"Ugh, you suck. Your turn!" Haley said as she moved closer to him. Nathan pretended like he didn't notice how sexy she was looking, but he couldn't think that way. "Well -?"

"I wish I knew how to quit you." His face was stern and void of emotion. Haley at first was a bit taken back, but then she realized the movie. "Well, I guess it would have been better if you were a dude, but hey. I still rule. Oh, I have another one." Haley couldn't help but smile at how Nathan was acting. For the first time in ages he looked genuinely happy.

Maybe it was the fact that they were spending time doing something simple, but yet held so much of who they were. Simplicity and laugher; mixed in with a whole mess of problems. "If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer!"

Haley snorted in amusement. She hated admitting the fact that she was indeed quite surprised at how carefree Nathan had become. Who would have thought they would switch places. " Jim Carrey fan much?" He gave her a genuine, but pained smile. There was so much to Nathan that Haley couldn't even begin to understand, but maybe in time she would.

"It's like old times." Nathan said softly, running a hair through his hair in frustration. "God, what happened to us, _baby_?"

She couldn't help but gasp at his term of endearment. " Nathan , I -"

_It took all the strength in the world for Haley to hold back the tears that were burning her eyes. Nathan lay next to her, snoring away, not even aware at how drastically her life had changed. This night, this perfect moment was not supposed to be like this. Nathan, or any guy for that matter, was not supposed to be drunk out of his mind and out cold. Haley blinked as a stray tear slid down her cheek. Her first time was not supposed to be a meaningless screw; it was suppose to be everything. Haley couldn't help but flinch when she felt Nathan's arm grab her and pull her close. Choking back a painful sob, Haley snuggled close to him. _

_Honestly, she was not sure what got them to this point. She hadn't known Nathan for a very long time, but yet it was so easy to climb into bed with him. All her years of waiting and vowing to save herself for the man she was in love with seemed pointless the moment Nathan kissed her. Haley didn't have any experience but when Nathan was with her it truly felt different. She let out a frustrated sigh, now Haley knew she was just feeding into her delusions._

_Her body ached in an unfamiliar way, but she didn't have the guts to get up and leave. Part of the reasons she gave into Nathan was the fear of never having the chance again. Sure, it seemed silly and completely irresponsible, but in some strange way it made sense. Feeling Nathan's arms wrapped tightly around her, she truly felt protected and wanted, like maybe he did need her. "Baby." He moaned quietly, hugging her tightly. "Why aren't you sleeping?"_

_"Just thinking."_

_Nathan sat up, rubbing his eyes wearily. "You regret this don't you?"_

_"Should I?" She questioned meekly. "I - I really don't know what to think right now. This is a lot to take in." It was taking a lot of her strength to hold back what was really on her mind. "You were drunk and I - never mind. I'm being stupid."_

_He sighed, taking her hand. "You want to know if it meant something to me?" Damn, she hated how well he knew her. "Baby, it meant more to me then you think."_

_"I'm just scared." Haley admitted somewhat bravely. "This could change us." He nodded in understand. "I know we aren't anything to one another, but I value our friendship more then you could ever imagine."_

_As tired as he was, Haley could see that he was desperately trying to listen and be coherent. "Hales, you are my best friend." Haley gave him a sheepish grin, trying to hide the tears. "Yes, you frustrate the hell outta me and I think you are an annoying little shit, but god I need you so much." He breathed in deeply. "I love you, seriously." Haley knew he meant it only in a friend way, but the very fact that he said it made her night much easier to handle. "I wish I could say more, but I am really tired. Maybe we can talk in the morning?"_

_"I'd like that."_


	13. Chapter 13

"_**To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded." - Ralph Waldo Emerson**_

Top of Form 1

Hate and love have the nasty habit of feeding off one another. One could muster up all the hate in the world for the person they love and in the end it still isn't enough. What the heart wants will never be silenced, it will continue nagging until the person finally gives in. Fighting it is what makes the whole process so difficult. Some will tell you that it is impossible to hate someone that you love, and love someone that you hate, but that is far from true. They bring out such fire and spirit that all you can do is love them, despite the hate that rages inside of you. The funny thing about these people is that they know all the right buttons to push and they push them frequently. Perhaps it's how they show their affection, because they can't help but be afraid of what this love might do to them. 

Nathan was growing comfortable being around Haley. A month had gone by and in reality it felt like much longer. There were countless fights over petty things, but yet there were moments so raw and passionate that Nathan couldn't help but be surprised. Truthfully, they hadn't been physical with one another since the date, but the conversations they were having made Nathan realize why Haley was his lifesaver. She was such a special woman and Nathan loved her. Loving someone seems so easy, but yet it causes so many problems. Sure, we all want to be able to say those three little words, but the courage it takes could bring a man to his knees. Nathan wasn't sure he would ever get the courage. 

It was another boring Friday and Nathan was doing his usual laying around. Haley was at work and apparently she had a "date" afterward. Jealously was something Nathan never conveyed well and the very fact that his Haley was out with some prick made for a very broody night. "God, I am freakin' acting like Lucas." He muttered to himself, throwing the remote on the table in anger. Why was she messing with his head? They had such great times together and she decides to go out on a date. He was sure that he would go into cardiac arrest if she brought him home. 

He knew that he couldn't do it anymore. Playing around the fact that he was so desperately in love with her was becoming ridiculous. Nathan knew what he wanted, he had it all perfectly planned out in his mind, but he wasn't sure Haley wanted it anymore. He slammed his eyes shut and breathed in deeply. The liquor was beginning to cloud his thoughts and for a moment he felt relaxed. But things have a habit of going bad. A giggle could be heard from outside the door and Nathan immediately knew it was Haley. 

Nathan stood up and walked over to the door, pressing his ear against it. He made a face of disgust when he heard them talking, it was grotesque. "Well, I had a really nice time." Haley said politely. God, don't kiss her, Nathan thought to himself. "I really have to get - " Nathan knew that the prick had kissed her and he groaned outwardly, loud enough for the people outside to hear. "Oh my God!" Haley replied exasperated. "Um, I will call you tomorrow."   
It all happened so fast, Nathan didn't even have to react. The door swung up, knocking him right it the nose and on his ass. "Shit!" He yelled, trying to stop the blood from pouring out. "Dammit Haley." 

"Oh, are you okay?" She sat down next to him, examining his face carefully. "I am so sorry!"  
He scoffed, standing up off the ground and stomping into the kitchen. "I'm sure you are." Haley gaped at him, he was obviously jealous. "You couldn't possibly know that I was standing right by the door." 

"Well, I did know." She admitted with a sly smile. "I didn't mean to hurt you though, but what the hell do you think you were doing?" 

Nathan blinked. He was bleeding and feeling queasy and she wanted to argue? "What was I doing? Hm, well I was listening to you and your date." 

"Perv." Haley muttered, sitting up on the counter. "Get over here and let me take a look at your nose. If it's broken I gotta take you to the hospital." He sighed and stood in front of her, placing his hands on her hips for support. "Looks okay to me." 

He rolled his eyes and pulled away from her as fast as possible. "I'm going to bed."  
----------------------------------------  
Haley didn't even have a moment to respond, which was probably for the better, he sure was pissed. She wasn't an idiot, Nathan was jealous and she loved it. It was about time he started to realize that he had to fight for her, that she wasn't just going to be there when he was feeling horny and lonely. A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she stormed into her bathroom, all she wanted to do was relax and get her mind off of Nathan. She lit a few candles and then slipped into the warm water. Haley took a sip of her wine and closed her eyes, taking in the quiet. 

Nathan had other plans. He barged into the bathroom, not really caring what Haley was doing. She shrieked and desperately tried to hide behind the mountain of bubbles. Nathan couldn't help but laugh, "Please, it's not like I don't know what you look like."  
"Asshole." Haley muttered, again taking a long sip of her wine. "Do you mind?" 

He shook his head and shut the door. "No, I don't. I think we need to talk." 

"Can't it wait?" She questioned. Haley couldn't help but notice how sexy Nathan looked. His flannel pajama bottoms hung loosely off his hips, and dear God he was shirtless. "I - so what do you want?" 

"I don't want you to see that guy anymore." He stated matter of factly. Haley laughed out right, who the hell did he think he was? Hot or not; Nathan was not about to start dictating her life. "He is just not right for you, Hales." 

Haley rolled her eyes. "Right, well until the person who is right for me decides to pull his head out of his head ass and actually do something, that is what I am stuck with." She could see the apprehension is face. The insecurity of going into a serious relationship, but she didn't care. "Is that all you wanted? Because I really just want to enjoy my bath." 

"Yeah, well I guess it is." Nathan muttered, embarrassed by how Haley called him out on his faults. "Did you have fun?" 

She shrugged. "Not really. He was kind of a jerk." Haley was surprised by Nathan's reaction. He didn't say anything witty or do that stupid ass smirk, he just nodded. "Hey, do you want to join me?" 

"Wha - what?" He croaked out, his mouth going dry. "Woman, how many glasses have you had?" 

Haley giggled and made room for Nathan. She wasn't sure what was guiding her. It was as if everything in her brain was being run by the sheer fact that Nathan looked hot as hell. At first he seemed a bit shy, which was not the Nathan she knew, but then he warmed up. Haley watched intently as he removed those pants that hung so loosely to his hips, and then his boxers. She remembered it was like to first seem him, how nervous and scared she was, but now Haley didn't care. "You better share that wine with me." 

"Of course." Haley sat as she felt his hands run up and down her legs. "When are you going to fess up to the fact that you were jealous?"  
Nathan looked at her in mock horror. It was obvious that Nathan Scott did not get jealous. "Woman, you know that I do not get jealous." 

"Whatever you say." She replied playfully. Wait till Brooke hears about this latest escapade. Haley hated admitted that she was a bit thankful for what Brooke did. Having Nathan around was exactly what she needed. "Can I ask you a question?" Nathan nodded, taking a long gulp of her wine. "Why were you so mean to me back then? Could you really not stand me that much?" 

He ran a hand through his hand in frustration. "I never hated you." Nathan admitted softly. "I guess - I don't even know, really. You were the first girl I ever met who didn't put up with the bull shit, you know? I guess I was so mean to you because I hated that you had such happiness. Like, it was always inside of you and I felt that you had everything. God, when you took me to meet your family it was the best day of my life because they actually cared and I felt like I belonged somewhere. I hated you for what you had, but I needed you because of it." Nathan breathed in deeply, he hated remembering the night. "The moment I knew I needed you was when - well you remember..." 

_His lungs were on fire, but Nathan still ran. There was no way he was going to stay there and let his dad beat the hell out of him, no way. All because of a stupid basketball game, Nathan nearly ended up in the hospital. His dad was drunk as hell because Deb was off screwing some guy and Nathan was caught in the line of fire. He knew he shouldn't have egged Dan on, but Nathan couldn't help it. Dan was a pathetic excuse for a man and Nathan hated him for it.  
_

_Haley was the first person Nathan thought of when his dad began to hit him. The moment his dad stepped back, Nathan ran. She was the only person who would understand this, who wouldn't have pity on him, but actually help him. Rain poured down heavily on his tired body, but he had to make it. A flash of lighting lit up the whole sky and Nathan breathed a sigh of relief when she saw her house. Thankfully the light in her window was on and she was awake, because it was going to be a long night. He didn't even need to throw a rock because she saw him standing there. A moment later Haley was standing out in the rain, questioning him. "Can we go inside first?"  
_

_"Of course!" Haley said quickly. When the reached her bedroom she grabbed a few towels and handed them to him. Haley sat on the edge of her bed, watching him intently. "What happened?"  
_

_It took all the strength he had to hold back the tears, but it was just to powerful. A heart wrenching sob escaped his lips and he told her. "I hate him, Hales. He was so angry tonight and I didn't even do anything. God, I hate being blamed for the fact that my mom is a slut and she is cheating on him. I hate that he uses basketball as a way to control me, because now I can't even enjoy the game. I hate that when he drinks I have to worry about whether or not his gonna punch me in the face." Haley gasped. "I don't even know what to do anymore."  
_

_"Why don't you tell someone?" She asked, running a hand tenderly over his bruised face. "Nathan, I am sure if I told someone they could help you."  
_

_He shook his head in disagreement. Telling would only cause for more embarrassment. Nathan knew that people looked up to him. He seemed to have it all, and if word got out that his Dad was a drunk bastard - well it wouldn't be good. "No. Hales, promise me you won't tell anyone." Nathan could tell that she did not agreement, but there was no way she would break his trust. "I don't think I can run back home, do you think I could just sleep here?"  
_

_"I was going to make you stay away." Haley whispered, giving him a smile. "Don't let him hurt you anymore." She placed a soft kiss on his forehead and then they laid in her bed silently.  
_

_Sleep was not coming easy and Nathan couldn't shake all the questions running through his brain. "Hales." He whispered into the darkness, grasping her hand tightly. "I'm afraid."  
_

_"Of Dan?" She asked, snuggling up closer to him.  
_

_Nathan shook his head. "No, I am more afraid of becoming him. Like, I dunno - I feel that I should never find a girl because I don't want to hurt her. Like when I become a father, I don't want to be my dad, Hales."   
_

_"Oh, Nathan." Haley murmured. "You don't ever need to worry about that. Not only are you a great man, but one day you are going to be a great father. You are going to have a wonderful life and a beautiful wife and everything will be perfect. Want to know how I know that? It's because you deserve it. Nathan, you have the chance to do something great in this world."  
_

_"How can you say that about me?" He asked weakly. "I am just a normal guy."  
_

_Even through the darkness Nathan could see her infectious smile. "That's why you are going to do great things."  
Haley brushed the tear that slid down her cheek at the memory. Even then she knew he was such a wonderful man, but Haley always wondered why he could never see it. They both said nothing, but sat in silence. "The water is cold..."  
_

_"Yeah, I guess we gotta get out." Nathan grabbed the towel that was hanging and wrapped it around his waist tightly. "Thanks for listening." Haley was stunned that he was able to just get up and leave. She blamed the fact that he was remembering how awful his father was_.  
---------------------------  
"Holy shit!" Brooke squealed with happiness. "Why didn't you tell me this sooner?" Haley now realized why she kept her secret about what went on between Nathan because of the sheer fact that Brooke was crazy. It really wasn't a big deal. All she did was ask if he would join her in the nice, relaxing bath. Nothing really strange about that. Brooke, of course, disagreed and rambled on about how important this was in their relationship. "You guys are seriously so close to fuc-" 

"Do not finish that sentence." Haley scolded, not wanting to think about it. "We are so not close to that." There was no use denying that they were sexually attracted to one another, but the rest of it was just messy. He was constantly being hot and cold, wanting her and then leaving her high and dry. It was just like freakin high school all over again. "How is California treating you?" 

Brooke giggled. "It is fucking amazing." Haley rolled her eyes. She couldn't help but be a little bit jealous that her friend was having the time of her life, while she was suffering with Scrooge. "I am so tan and Lucas looks like walking sex." 

"I'm sure." Haley muttered angrily. "Anyway, Nathan is going to be home soon and I really need to go and I don't know - do something." 

"You are going to go and whore yourself up so that you two can have wild, hot, animalistic sex?" Haley choked on the cupcake that she was currently eating. "Haley, are you okay?" 

She coughed loudly into the phone. "I'm fine. I just - I need to go. I'll talk to you tomorrow." 

Why did everyone insist on making it seem that Nathan was perfect for her? It was painfully obvious that he wasn't. Their relationship was way to dysfunctional and Haley knew that noting serious would work between them. Maybe being friends with benefits? No, that was what got her in this damn situation in the first place. Haley hated admitting that she was never going to escape Nathan, that he was always going to be in her life. 

There was a time when Haley thought that he was going to be in her life forever and it wasn't because he wanted it. 

_Haley sat on her bathroom counter top nervously, trying not to think it was true. She was just a little bit late, it was no big deal. God, why did she have to be so stupid? Her first time with Nathan and he was drunk and stupidly forget protection. Haley wasn't going to blame herself for this one, no way in hell. Being how nervous she was, there was no way she could have possibly thought of the word "condom." Maybe she wasn't? She didn't even take a test yet, but Haley didn't want to do anything without Nathan. Haley groaned, she knew he was going freak out.  
_

_With a shaky hand, Haley dialed his number. "Hey, can you come over? I really need to talk to you. Yeah, it's really important. Okay bye." It felt like an eternity, but after ten minutes there he was standing in her bathroom. Nathan looked baffled by her hysterical crying, but he coolly tried to find out what was the better.  
_

_"Hales, what is going on?" He asked rubbing her back. Haley didn't say anything but clung to him tighter, trying to hide from the fear that she couldn't come to terms with. "Okay you are kind of freaking me out. What's wrong?"  
_

_"Nathan you are going to be so mad." Haley cried, wiping her nose. "I - I didn't mean for it to happen, it was just - I - oh God." He looked at her strangely, not sure what she was talking about. "Nathan, I'm - well I think that I am - I'm not so sure yet, but I think - gosh - okay I think that I am pregnant."  
_

_He said nothing for a good two minutes, which only proved to Haley that her theory on his reaction was dead on. "What?" His tone was harsh and cold. _

_"What the fuck are you talking about Haley?"  
_

_"You heard me. I think I am pregnant, actually I am about 99.9 sure that I am!" She fired back, pulling away from his grasp. "I didn't take the test yet because I wanted to do this with you."   
_

_Nathan rolled his eyes and turned away from him. "You are so fucking stupid."   
_

_"Excuse me?" Haley replied hotly. "I'm stupid? Right, well you were the drunk asshole who fucking took advantage of me and then told me it actually meant something. Forgive me."  
_

_"God, don't give me your sarcastic bull shit right now." He yelled back. "I just can't believe that you aren't on the pill or anything. Do you pride yourself on being a dumb ass Haley?"  
_

_Tears streamed down her pale face, but she was not going to let him win. It takes two to tango buddy. "Don't be like this. Let me take the test and then we can scream at one another until we both pass out from exhaustion." She slammed the door in his face. The minutes seem to drag on in a slow, painful fashion, but then finally the timer went off and it was time. She gulped when she saw the results. **Negative. **Haley shakily opened the door and looked at Nathan intently. "Congratulations, you aren't going to be a father."   
_

_"But, you - you said?" Nathan stuttered. "Well, I guess this is good huh."  
_

_Haley laughed in spite of herself. "Are you joking? Now that I know how you would act if I really was pregnant. I can't believe you."  
_

_"I was scared Hales." Nathan defended quietly. She scoffed, did he really think that he could defend himself? "What did you really expect me to say?"  
_

_"You are such a sick son of a bitch!" Haley screamed, picking up her jewelry box and throwing it toward him."  
_

_Nathan tucked and it crashed into the wall, spilling everything she owned in it, but Haley didn't care. It showed that the relationship between her and Nathan was pointless because he wasn't going to be there for her. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" _

_Bottom of Form 1_

_"Leave." Haley demanded, pointing to her door. "I don't ever want to speak to you again."_


End file.
